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comments and updates from foot hell

Posted by Kay S on 11/30/00 at 19:21 (033897)

I have been reading everyone's messages, but until tonight could not bring myself to write a word because this has been such a bad two weeks with the PAIN. It never ever goes away and now it is interrupting my sleep several times a night. I went to a store yesterday (using a stroller to lean on and place my purchases)to buy some things for Christmas, and had my 81 year old mother wait in the line to check out because I couldn't stand. Am I pathetic or what?????? I didn't want anyone to know we were together because I knew someone would think 'how rude that she is letting that old lady stand there while she sits' and frankly, I wouldn't blame anyone for thinking that because I felt the same way. I feel like I am hanging by a thread lately. I am now doing a desk job at work that all the nurses hate to do--the hours stink and it is mentally taxing--but otherwise I wouldn't be able to work at all. I am limping most of the time, and don't know how I could do any less than I am doing. I sit here, sit there, lean, kneel, and whatever else takes the weight off these horrible appendages. I am thinking I may have to take the antidepressant route soon. As you know, I am scheduled to have the ESWT on Dec. 14th, and feel that this is my only hope and cannot wait to have it done. Even a LITTLE better would be acceptable. I am crabby and irritable and I don't like it one bit. 24 hours a day I think about my feet. Chemo was much easier than this and I am not kidding.
Yes, I do have a lot to be thankful for, but at the moment I don't want to be reminded of that---I want to wallow in my self pity for a few more days before I decide I can't stand myself and then I will start appreciating life again. For the moment, this all sucks and I feel like I am missing out on my life because I am so obsessed with my feet.
I also want to express my sympathy to all who shared their stories of deaths of loved ones and friends. No one escapes these things if you have relationships, but it is often a struggle to the ones left behind. You all seem to know how to BE friends, which means you HAVE friends.
RE: the weight issue. I am not in that situation (don't be mad at me--I'm weak in spirit and couldn't take it now) but I did want to tell you that since I work in a surgical area, Metabolife is frowned upon because of the herbs. Ionamine (sp?) Redux and one other that I can't remember are all prescription diet pills that can't be that safe because if you are having surgery, the anesthesiologists at my hospital make the patients be off these drugs for two weeks before they can have it. If anyone wants more info I can ask questions about it, but I thought before any of you jump on that bandwagon I'd warn you!
Thank you for allowing me to dump here. I am already feeling better.
Kay

Re: comments and updates from foot hell

Steve P on 11/30/00 at 20:02 (033912)

Amen to that, Nancy! None of us will ever again be impatient with someone walking slowly ahead of us!
Kay, hang in there. ESWT helps a lot of people. We're pulling for you.

Re: comments and updates from foot hell

Laurie R on 11/30/00 at 21:12 (033925)

Hi Kay,
I am so sorry to hear that you are in so much pain.I hope you start feeling better soon. I sure know how you feel. Hang in there .Laurie R

Re: comments and updates from foot hell

Beverly on 11/30/00 at 22:36 (033931)

Kay,

Many of us have been or are currently in foot hell. So, when can sympathize with your pain. And I know how embarrassing it is to have elderly relatives wait in line for you.

I hope the EWST works. I would offer pearls of wisdom, but so far, I've yet to fix myself. I do regret that I didn't try shots sooner. They didn't do me a bit of good, but I sometimes wonder if they might have if I'd tried them before this stuff crawled up my legs and ankles.
This is a good place to vent.
Beverly

Re: comments and updates from foot hell

Bob G. on 12/01/00 at 00:33 (033936)

Good luck, Kay, I do wish you well in your search for recovery.

You have to make the decisions affecting your way to recovery as you go, be persistent and be patient.

This Board is a great source of information, comraderie and comfort.

Be well soon. BG

Re: Been there and done that

Barbara TX on 12/01/00 at 11:59 (033965)

Boy, Kathy, do I understand. I too have used the elderly to wait in lines for me - even wheel me around in wheelchairs, and I'm only 33! If I were a gambling woman I would bet that foot pain is high up on the list of things that cause depression. Mobility is a big factor in changing your mood. You hang in there - you have ESWT to look forward to and maybe some dramatic improvement as a Christmas present! B.

Re: Thanks, Judy

Barbara TX on 12/01/00 at 12:05 (033966)

Thanks for that pick me up. I know your advice was for Kay, but I'm going to steal it and use it myself - I'll have a mom's night out in the tub tonight after the kids are in bed... B.

Re: comments and updates from foot hell

Steve P on 11/30/00 at 20:02 (033912)

Amen to that, Nancy! None of us will ever again be impatient with someone walking slowly ahead of us!
Kay, hang in there. ESWT helps a lot of people. We're pulling for you.

Re: comments and updates from foot hell

Laurie R on 11/30/00 at 21:12 (033925)

Hi Kay,
I am so sorry to hear that you are in so much pain.I hope you start feeling better soon. I sure know how you feel. Hang in there .Laurie R

Re: comments and updates from foot hell

Beverly on 11/30/00 at 22:36 (033931)

Kay,

Many of us have been or are currently in foot hell. So, when can sympathize with your pain. And I know how embarrassing it is to have elderly relatives wait in line for you.

I hope the EWST works. I would offer pearls of wisdom, but so far, I've yet to fix myself. I do regret that I didn't try shots sooner. They didn't do me a bit of good, but I sometimes wonder if they might have if I'd tried them before this stuff crawled up my legs and ankles.
This is a good place to vent.
Beverly

Re: comments and updates from foot hell

Bob G. on 12/01/00 at 00:33 (033936)

Good luck, Kay, I do wish you well in your search for recovery.

You have to make the decisions affecting your way to recovery as you go, be persistent and be patient.

This Board is a great source of information, comraderie and comfort.

Be well soon. BG

Re: Been there and done that

Barbara TX on 12/01/00 at 11:59 (033965)

Boy, Kathy, do I understand. I too have used the elderly to wait in lines for me - even wheel me around in wheelchairs, and I'm only 33! If I were a gambling woman I would bet that foot pain is high up on the list of things that cause depression. Mobility is a big factor in changing your mood. You hang in there - you have ESWT to look forward to and maybe some dramatic improvement as a Christmas present! B.

Re: Thanks, Judy

Barbara TX on 12/01/00 at 12:05 (033966)

Thanks for that pick me up. I know your advice was for Kay, but I'm going to steal it and use it myself - I'll have a mom's night out in the tub tonight after the kids are in bed... B.