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Scott and his lack of bedmaking skills

Posted by john h on 8/11/01 at 17:47 (056354)

As a former proud military man it has come to my attention through the shamless pictures of scotts bed that he has defamed the memory of such heroes as Generals George Patton, Dwight Esienhower, Robert E. Lee, Cornwallis,Bonaparte and all military men who would and did properly make their bed. General Lee actually developed heelspurs from wearing spurs while riding his trusted horse Traveler. All these men knew how to make a military bed and did so. The following URL will describe how to make a bed to Scott: http://www.learn2.com/06/0630/0630.asp

Some additonal information for the proper military bed: (1) fitted sheets are prohibited and are for sissys (2) all cotton of the 250 count percale or wool is acceptable (3) all sheets shall be of the standard single size so as to fit the standard cot or bunk bed which are nowadays called 'sissy twin beds'. Under no circumstances will a military man be caught sleeping in a 'Queen Bed' or 'King Bed'. We are all alike in the military. If you must sleep with your spouse the standard cot or bunkbed will suffice after all you are made of sterner stuff than the civilians that surround us. (4) Beds should have no foundation but may be supported by a piece of one -half inch plywood cut to specifications. Scott's bed appears to meet this standard. (5) blankets should be all wool and may be army green,air force blue, or navy white. the marines are free to use any color they want. (6) pillows filled with horse hair are preferred. (7) Anyone caught sleeping with silk sheets will immediately be blocked from Scott's Heelspurs.Com forever. This is unforgivable. Now listen up all you wives, whipped husbands, and fun loving bachelors and bacheloretts it is time to come to grips with this bed making or lack thereof.

By Order of The Commander

Re: Scott and his lack of bedmaking skills

JudyS on 8/11/01 at 18:28 (056358)

too much time on your hands, big guy.....

Re: Scott and his lack of bedmaking skills

john h on 8/11/01 at 18:31 (056359)

it is raining! i am bored!

Re: Bedmaking skills

Glenn X on 8/11/01 at 19:03 (056364)

Commander: Outstanding good work. Crisp and detailed bed-making instructions on the URL you referenced --- except for the bedspread. In my Air Force, bedspreads were for sissies. Are you saying they're OK now?

Re: Bedmaking skills

Stephanie S. on 8/11/01 at 19:18 (056367)

John...Give it up...it's not working...I know ...I know...your in hopes of the 'next' new picture up on the site will be of 'me' making Scott's bed for him....

But then again...all this 'mula' he has..maybe the pay is good...umm....I could use a job!

Steph

Re: Bedmaking skills

Tammie on 8/11/01 at 19:38 (056371)

Oh my is this to funny good medicine thease laughs. Heh checked with the hubby who is ex Af only I believe once military always sticks with u, he says no bedspreads not in military beds only good old green wool blankets so those quarters could bonce nice! Now exmilitary beds at home can have nice comfortable soft not scratchy blankets but they mus tbe just so and not get in the way of making a nice tight bed! Oh oh no quarters on my comforter it has puffs in it lol! Oh no, will not pass your inspection! Oh my how interesting and funny bedmaking is yes think we have to much time !

Re: Scott and his lack of bedmaking skills

Nancy N on 8/11/01 at 21:59 (056381)

Did you notice this part of the instructions?

'Now you're going to create a nice, tight confining area to
slide into at night. Your feet will be unable to shift around,
and you can get some small idea of what a straight jacket feels
like as you fall asleep.'

Doesn't sound so good for our night-splinted friends, sir. And I myself have no desire to find out what a straight jacket feels like!!!

Re: Bedmaking skills

john h on 8/11/01 at 22:24 (056384)

tammie: your husband also knows a little about making beds in that you can bounce the quarter better with no sheets but sometimes the lousy incpectors look under that blanket.

Re: Bedmaking skills/hehehe

Donna M on 8/11/01 at 23:26 (056390)

I think somebody needs to sneak in and short sheet Scotts bed!!

Re: Scott and his lack of bedmaking skills

JudyS on 8/11/01 at 18:28 (056358)

too much time on your hands, big guy.....

Re: Scott and his lack of bedmaking skills

john h on 8/11/01 at 18:31 (056359)

it is raining! i am bored!

Re: Bedmaking skills

Glenn X on 8/11/01 at 19:03 (056364)

Commander: Outstanding good work. Crisp and detailed bed-making instructions on the URL you referenced --- except for the bedspread. In my Air Force, bedspreads were for sissies. Are you saying they're OK now?

Re: Bedmaking skills

Stephanie S. on 8/11/01 at 19:18 (056367)

John...Give it up...it's not working...I know ...I know...your in hopes of the 'next' new picture up on the site will be of 'me' making Scott's bed for him....

But then again...all this 'mula' he has..maybe the pay is good...umm....I could use a job!

Steph

Re: Bedmaking skills

Tammie on 8/11/01 at 19:38 (056371)

Oh my is this to funny good medicine thease laughs. Heh checked with the hubby who is ex Af only I believe once military always sticks with u, he says no bedspreads not in military beds only good old green wool blankets so those quarters could bonce nice! Now exmilitary beds at home can have nice comfortable soft not scratchy blankets but they mus tbe just so and not get in the way of making a nice tight bed! Oh oh no quarters on my comforter it has puffs in it lol! Oh no, will not pass your inspection! Oh my how interesting and funny bedmaking is yes think we have to much time !

Re: Scott and his lack of bedmaking skills

Nancy N on 8/11/01 at 21:59 (056381)

Did you notice this part of the instructions?

'Now you're going to create a nice, tight confining area to
slide into at night. Your feet will be unable to shift around,
and you can get some small idea of what a straight jacket feels
like as you fall asleep.'

Doesn't sound so good for our night-splinted friends, sir. And I myself have no desire to find out what a straight jacket feels like!!!

Re: Bedmaking skills

john h on 8/11/01 at 22:24 (056384)

tammie: your husband also knows a little about making beds in that you can bounce the quarter better with no sheets but sometimes the lousy incpectors look under that blanket.

Re: Bedmaking skills/hehehe

Donna M on 8/11/01 at 23:26 (056390)

I think somebody needs to sneak in and short sheet Scotts bed!!