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A sort of update and a thank u

Posted by Tammie on 10/26/01 at 15:46 (063646)

I just thought I would like to post and say this, after realizing that this was 8 weeks post op from the tts surgery, I was very happy to realize it has been such a short time! To me it seems like it had been years instead of weeks. I was happy because I had begun to believe there was no hope to a chance of healing, I had begun to think I am at the end and there is no sunshine ahead. Today after thinking about it and seeing it is only 8 weeks I have renewed hope and energy. I am a most impatient sort of person and always anxious to get on to the next hurdle, not waiting to see if I can clear it or not just keep going and oops if I fall dust knees off and keep going sort.

I wanted to say to some that are going thru this healing , that I am not certain if things can ever be the same as they once were, and I am not sure what it is fair to want or expect from this surgery or this afliction we have been dealt with but I have been blessed thru this with many new friends and tho they can not heal my feet, they sure have lifted my heart and kept my head from hitting the floor! I have recieved alot of knowledge from this baord and the people here and have told many people of this site, and hope if they visit here they to will find what they need to help them thru this turmoil!

I am back to work 3 days a week and no two together 9 hrs a day, I am a nurses aide as some know and tho it has been really hard I love my work and and feel blessed at the fact I am there. It is by no means easy and for anyone thinking about returning to work to quickly think hard about it as yes it sounds at time like the only choice and 'maybe ' you could do it, but I think u will find as I have it might not be to smart a decision and may have some effects that are very close to what u wanted to fix by getting the surgery.Maybe if there is sit down work might be better, could not say. And another thing if your employers say they want to and will work with u to make returning easyier for u think again as it may be good for a day if you are lucky or again get it in writing! I had a dr, release stating exactly what he wanted for me and stating no 2 days together in order for my release, well I am working days in a row now and over the hours stated and well u get the message, it is very hard to follow, on all involved. Please think really hard about it , protect yourself as no one else can!

Now heh I am not grumbling, I love my job but also know that my feet will pay the price for my eagerness.And added will be me as the lack of sleep do to the sleepless painful nights, and the added swelling and other things . Just if I can help one other I would feel good! I am someday somewhere going to have to either heal or adjust to what may be. And in the mean time I am enjoying holding hands with some of the best sweetest grannies and grandpas around! We sometimes must make a picture, think of it as we struggle together to walk the halls! LOL Take care to all and hugs!

Re: A sort of update and a thank u

BrianG on 10/26/01 at 22:36 (063666)

Hi Tammy,

I can read through the lines, and I know you are facing an uphill battle in getting back to work. I think you have to look at YOUR long range healing and plans. Yes, you are helping people now, but what happens in the next few months if your feet never heal, get worse? This work, pain, rest, is a vicious circle. One that can break even the strongest of us. I know you feel that you need to work at this time, I pray it is the right decision. Best wishes, be talking to ya.

BCG

PS Continue to be honest with your doc, and keep GOOD records of everything. You never know when they will come in handy. A daily work / pain journal might be good.

Re: Another trip to the Pod, does anyone have any advice to my trouble?

Tammie on 11/03/01 at 09:23 (064045)

Yes Brian I know you are right, It just is so very hard having your life as u know it taken from u when it is only my feet that hurt. I recieved another favorite cortisone shot as he said I have much inflamation and alot of swelling. He wants me to back off work for 2 weeks and then return only 4 hrs a day with 2 on feet 2 off.How can you maintain work this way? When you have already been off 6 months and come back 3 weeks and tell them off again, they won't like it either.How do u pay the bills when u are not working,they just dont pay themselves.Savings are almost exhausted from the 6 month off. I mentioned about wearing the boot to him he said yes with my orthodic inside would maybe help some, but he said the best would be to give time for foot to heal.

What is said makes sense to me I almost understand the logic but then how do u get that across to the others who have no idea of what feet can do to a person? He could not believe I was working the 9 hrs, said no he wrote a note to work with the 4 hr thing and wrote it till he says further instrutions, but if I give them that they will most likly tell me goodbye.I cant risk that either,yes denial I hear u but lol there is that but again,I must do what I must do and I guess I do not deserve to whine as I am bringing on this pain myself i feel like a huge failure,I only want to do what I need to I am not asking for mall walking or playing, I am just asking to be able to work my job without pain and being able to sleep my nights again and them not be alone in a chair or in a spare room ,tossing and turning and whining and more then a couple of hrs a night.Is there anything I can do to keep working??? Does anybody have ANY advice?

Facts as he sees it are, 2 surgeries, 1 the first the spur and the pf release,time to heal
fact the nerve decompression aug 30
fact he says time to heal is needed
fact you have swelling to much, more damage may be done
fact the lump under foot (forgot what he called it) but he did not like it
factyou could see rubbing marks where I am toe walking again on top of foot
fact other foot is feeling the pain now
fact cannot continue getting cortisone as i have had many already
fact the pain is great and u are not sleeping it is keeping u awake and what do u think that means?
fact u need to take time to heal your foot or risk possible worse damage
Fact this does not pay the bills and how do people live being off work for so long 6 mnths and back to work 3 weeks and now more time off? How do u tell a empoyer this? What makes u think they will keep me?
Fact I also have a hubby who has his own illnesses, a child in college and son who will graduate in spring and a daughter who is 13 who all think this is absoulutly crazy.And many telling me I have a quack for a dr. If he was any good I would have been fixed and back to work in a few weeks.
Ok fact is I am feeling all of this and unsure of how to deal with any of it.HELP!I am to the drowning point someone please help me find the right road please.

Re: Another trip to the Pod, does anyone have any advice to my trouble?

BrianG on 11/03/01 at 12:17 (064053)

Hi Tammy,

If only we could say a special prayer to make it all go away..... You mentioned wearing your boot at work. I wore my removable cast / boot at my old job for about a year. It did help my heel a little, as it was well padded. But something else happened, it changed my gait and I had to stop wearing it. I was getting pain in the opposite knee and hip. I don't think the boot is a long term help. Other than a miracle, the only thing I can think of, that will help at this point, is long term pain meds, and I know you don't want that option.

Anyone else? Tammy could really use some good advice right now. Don't be bashfull :*)

BCG

Re: Another trip to the Pod, does anyone have any advice to my trouble?

Glenn X on 11/03/01 at 12:27 (064054)

Hi Tammie: Since I'm still hobbling like hell, I'm not much confident in any advice I might give. But I do agree that rest is essential. Taping can help rest the fascia and give you some added mobility. I don't recall if you do that. Realistically though I don't believe taping is the answer to getting you back on your feet for nine hours a day.

Taping is just one way to support the arch and rest the fascia. Proper orthotics or arch supports would seem to be important too.

The only other thing I can suggest is flexibility. I read through Scott's book again and appreciate where he describes that what got his PF under control was months of rest and calve stretching that sometimes had to be pushed a little.

Re: Thanks Guys

Tammie on 11/03/01 at 21:46 (064078)

Well I guess with my luck the way it has been going I will drown for sure but I will keep on trying all the way to the bottom of the water, did I mention I am not fond of water, it will be one blank of a fight.

Meds are not in this for me as I just do not think my Dr. is going to do this nor shall I ask cause I am not going to be called a wimp or given that quizacal look like i am a junkie of sorts, I have come this far without very much and I will go till I cannot go anymore.

Taping yes I have done this but unfortuantly it really seems to agrivate my foot seems first it is to tight then it rubs where it sends wonderful delightful sensations thru my foot, the dr tried taping me and before I left office I was telling him I had to rip it off or go crazy. Now my so called good foot well yes it does feel good on it so will keep that up.

I do have orthodics I have had those for at least 5 months I am guessing along with 2 newer pairs of Nb shoesthis last pair I got has much more padding and seems great on good foot bad foot well nothing seems to please it and I do mean nothing.

I know the boot is not the permenant answer, but at least it would give my poor toes a break from being walked on as I do not toe walk with it. Also when I squat down to lift or pull up pants on people or put shoes on a million times a day It would protect my foot a bit I would think? I will put my orthodic inside it as that is what the Dr. told me to do. It is heavey and hot which I hate but the less of evils is tolerable.

Now the stretching can anyone please tell me what would be good for me and safe? My pt gave me some but I am frightened from them as the last time it started terrible stuff in foot and leg. If u know anything to help like spasams in feet like if I poit toes down I get crampy spasam feelings also if I stretch out foot it feels like a tearing or ripping sensation I always worry what I am doing. I know I have ankle weakness as I can feel it give often . Calf at this point feels pretty good.
I feel as tho I am asking for a miracle and maybe I am and I know I most likly dont deserve any help as i am impatient and just cant seem to keep myself out of trouble.But I am asking for any advice anyone has. I dont even know what is left for me at this point, I am not giving up and I refuse to allow my feet to rob me of my job at this point< I really cannot I jsut cant explain the reasons as they are to personal. Hugs to all who have tried to support this hard headed female! Thanks again , looking forward to any help

Re: A sort of update and a thank u

BrianG on 10/26/01 at 22:36 (063666)

Hi Tammy,

I can read through the lines, and I know you are facing an uphill battle in getting back to work. I think you have to look at YOUR long range healing and plans. Yes, you are helping people now, but what happens in the next few months if your feet never heal, get worse? This work, pain, rest, is a vicious circle. One that can break even the strongest of us. I know you feel that you need to work at this time, I pray it is the right decision. Best wishes, be talking to ya.

BCG

PS Continue to be honest with your doc, and keep GOOD records of everything. You never know when they will come in handy. A daily work / pain journal might be good.

Re: Another trip to the Pod, does anyone have any advice to my trouble?

Tammie on 11/03/01 at 09:23 (064045)

Yes Brian I know you are right, It just is so very hard having your life as u know it taken from u when it is only my feet that hurt. I recieved another favorite cortisone shot as he said I have much inflamation and alot of swelling. He wants me to back off work for 2 weeks and then return only 4 hrs a day with 2 on feet 2 off.How can you maintain work this way? When you have already been off 6 months and come back 3 weeks and tell them off again, they won't like it either.How do u pay the bills when u are not working,they just dont pay themselves.Savings are almost exhausted from the 6 month off. I mentioned about wearing the boot to him he said yes with my orthodic inside would maybe help some, but he said the best would be to give time for foot to heal.

What is said makes sense to me I almost understand the logic but then how do u get that across to the others who have no idea of what feet can do to a person? He could not believe I was working the 9 hrs, said no he wrote a note to work with the 4 hr thing and wrote it till he says further instrutions, but if I give them that they will most likly tell me goodbye.I cant risk that either,yes denial I hear u but lol there is that but again,I must do what I must do and I guess I do not deserve to whine as I am bringing on this pain myself i feel like a huge failure,I only want to do what I need to I am not asking for mall walking or playing, I am just asking to be able to work my job without pain and being able to sleep my nights again and them not be alone in a chair or in a spare room ,tossing and turning and whining and more then a couple of hrs a night.Is there anything I can do to keep working??? Does anybody have ANY advice?

Facts as he sees it are, 2 surgeries, 1 the first the spur and the pf release,time to heal
fact the nerve decompression aug 30
fact he says time to heal is needed
fact you have swelling to much, more damage may be done
fact the lump under foot (forgot what he called it) but he did not like it
factyou could see rubbing marks where I am toe walking again on top of foot
fact other foot is feeling the pain now
fact cannot continue getting cortisone as i have had many already
fact the pain is great and u are not sleeping it is keeping u awake and what do u think that means?
fact u need to take time to heal your foot or risk possible worse damage
Fact this does not pay the bills and how do people live being off work for so long 6 mnths and back to work 3 weeks and now more time off? How do u tell a empoyer this? What makes u think they will keep me?
Fact I also have a hubby who has his own illnesses, a child in college and son who will graduate in spring and a daughter who is 13 who all think this is absoulutly crazy.And many telling me I have a quack for a dr. If he was any good I would have been fixed and back to work in a few weeks.
Ok fact is I am feeling all of this and unsure of how to deal with any of it.HELP!I am to the drowning point someone please help me find the right road please.

Re: Another trip to the Pod, does anyone have any advice to my trouble?

BrianG on 11/03/01 at 12:17 (064053)

Hi Tammy,

If only we could say a special prayer to make it all go away..... You mentioned wearing your boot at work. I wore my removable cast / boot at my old job for about a year. It did help my heel a little, as it was well padded. But something else happened, it changed my gait and I had to stop wearing it. I was getting pain in the opposite knee and hip. I don't think the boot is a long term help. Other than a miracle, the only thing I can think of, that will help at this point, is long term pain meds, and I know you don't want that option.

Anyone else? Tammy could really use some good advice right now. Don't be bashfull :*)

BCG

Re: Another trip to the Pod, does anyone have any advice to my trouble?

Glenn X on 11/03/01 at 12:27 (064054)

Hi Tammie: Since I'm still hobbling like hell, I'm not much confident in any advice I might give. But I do agree that rest is essential. Taping can help rest the fascia and give you some added mobility. I don't recall if you do that. Realistically though I don't believe taping is the answer to getting you back on your feet for nine hours a day.

Taping is just one way to support the arch and rest the fascia. Proper orthotics or arch supports would seem to be important too.

The only other thing I can suggest is flexibility. I read through Scott's book again and appreciate where he describes that what got his PF under control was months of rest and calve stretching that sometimes had to be pushed a little.

Re: Thanks Guys

Tammie on 11/03/01 at 21:46 (064078)

Well I guess with my luck the way it has been going I will drown for sure but I will keep on trying all the way to the bottom of the water, did I mention I am not fond of water, it will be one blank of a fight.

Meds are not in this for me as I just do not think my Dr. is going to do this nor shall I ask cause I am not going to be called a wimp or given that quizacal look like i am a junkie of sorts, I have come this far without very much and I will go till I cannot go anymore.

Taping yes I have done this but unfortuantly it really seems to agrivate my foot seems first it is to tight then it rubs where it sends wonderful delightful sensations thru my foot, the dr tried taping me and before I left office I was telling him I had to rip it off or go crazy. Now my so called good foot well yes it does feel good on it so will keep that up.

I do have orthodics I have had those for at least 5 months I am guessing along with 2 newer pairs of Nb shoesthis last pair I got has much more padding and seems great on good foot bad foot well nothing seems to please it and I do mean nothing.

I know the boot is not the permenant answer, but at least it would give my poor toes a break from being walked on as I do not toe walk with it. Also when I squat down to lift or pull up pants on people or put shoes on a million times a day It would protect my foot a bit I would think? I will put my orthodic inside it as that is what the Dr. told me to do. It is heavey and hot which I hate but the less of evils is tolerable.

Now the stretching can anyone please tell me what would be good for me and safe? My pt gave me some but I am frightened from them as the last time it started terrible stuff in foot and leg. If u know anything to help like spasams in feet like if I poit toes down I get crampy spasam feelings also if I stretch out foot it feels like a tearing or ripping sensation I always worry what I am doing. I know I have ankle weakness as I can feel it give often . Calf at this point feels pretty good.
I feel as tho I am asking for a miracle and maybe I am and I know I most likly dont deserve any help as i am impatient and just cant seem to keep myself out of trouble.But I am asking for any advice anyone has. I dont even know what is left for me at this point, I am not giving up and I refuse to allow my feet to rob me of my job at this point< I really cannot I jsut cant explain the reasons as they are to personal. Hugs to all who have tried to support this hard headed female! Thanks again , looking forward to any help