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A General but always from the Heart reply

Posted by Tammie on 12/05/01 at 19:41 (066263)

I know so many have said thoughtful words to me and I could answer each indiv. but decided the best way and the least space would be like this.
I again thank the many wonderful people here for sending in the rescue squad to my plea. If it wasnt for this board and i do include the biggest Thank u to Scott! I wonder where I might be at this time of my life! As others must have this wonder also. Life is a very hard road to travel with many pot holes to dodge and overcome, I guess as with any lingering illness or injury the road gets even more bumpier and harder to see a smoothe area ahead. We weave and try to miss them but inevitably we tend to hit some of them and they bring us down! Thankfully the wonderful brothers and sisters of this board all come in for the rescue! Thank u !I am back on the road I do hope.

Ok My plan as many want to know , it is a little at a time starting with the new Dr. on the 20 for a whole picture checkup and to help get a few things in prespective. Then I am sure u may be surprised to hear that I pushed myself to go in and close the door and talk with my boss. The talk was productive and i hope that they sincerly will work with me and knowing how much I value my type of work and how very much it hurts me to do it, we have figured out a few things to maye make it smoother and easyier on the ole feet. It is a trial I showed my feet for the first time, and the swelling was maybe at its worse so that I think helped for them to really see there is (something ) going on. I will keep my 3 days a week but have modified my duties somewhat. Today in fact I sat on a chair and set hair ,for a period of time, I also gave baths and was able to sit in a chair and bend over tub. I also am learning different ways to cope with the foot pain at work since I cannot take any medication for pain there ( leaves me dizzy and feeling nauseated). I guess people here have seen ways that it could work for me i have just been to darn stubborn with pride to want to use what is availiable. I am trying to push that aside and not just work thru it.Please pinch me if I travel off road!!!

This is a start and for me it is a huge one.I am actually pretty pleased with my start. It was very very hard for me to face facts. I will struggle as we go on I am sure. But again tomorrow is a new day and I will work with it .Thank you really from the whole of my heart for being here for me ! I hope to be there for each of you as well. I have always been strong willed and wanted to it ALL on my OWN. I now know I can't and it is ok to let someone else in to help . I have been doing some reading of some good spiritual lessons, I hope that this is also a way to let in the sun and take away the clouds. May all of u find your inner peace and tho we may not get all the answers we search for , maybe we will find our peace within our selves. Hugs to all of u and may the sun shine upon your hearts!

Re: A General but always from the Heart reply

nancy s. on 12/05/01 at 19:50 (066264)

tammie, Good For You and congratulations on your new start, and on what you did for your feet at work today. that's just terrific -- and i bet your patients were just as happy with you as always. i'm so glad to hear that you're trying harder to take care of yourself. i know personally how very difficult it is, but you won't be sorry. again, Good For You -- big applause for tammie is going on here in my little corner of maine!
nancy

Re: Yay, Tammie!

Carole C on 12/05/01 at 20:20 (066266)

We are cheering for you! :) Well done.

Carole

Re: A General but always from the Heart reply

Laurie R on 12/05/01 at 20:30 (066268)

Dear Tammie , YOU DID SOMETHING VERY HARD TODAY AT WORK .....BUT YOU DID IT ... I am so very proud of you and I hope you are proud of yourself .. But you took the first step to help yourself .... I would think your job will help you out . I know they have to know how hard of a worker you are and how very important it is for you to continue to work there.

Just take one day at a time , that is all anyone can ask of you ...

Again I am so very proud of you Tammie ...

Much love to you , Laurie R

Re: A General but always from the Heart reply

Beverly on 12/05/01 at 22:37 (066288)

Tammie, I'm glad you are standing up for what you need.
I didn't realize you were a hair stylist. No wonder you hurt in light of your PF! I can't even stand still in place for more than five minutes.
With your line of work, that involves so much standing still in one place.

I hope you feel better soon with this modified schedule.
Take care,
Beverly

Re: A General but always from the Heart reply

BrianG on 12/05/01 at 23:08 (066293)

Hi Tammy,

I'm real happy you finally leveled with your boss. I wish I could have seen her face whenyou showed her your feet, hahahaa. I hope you took a few minutes to put in a few 'bad' words for your trouble making friend :*)

One last thing about the pain meds. Many people tend to take too much when first starting out, therefore getting that woozy, spaced out feeling. If you can divide your pills, try taking a 1/2 pill, wait 3-4 hours and take the other half. If you do this for a week or so, you will be slowly building up to an amount that will help. We never want to strive to have the pain meds completely eliminate the pain, just enough to take the edge off, and let life become bearable again.

Hopefully the 20th will be very productive for you, good luck.

BCG

Re: A General but always from the Heart reply

Suzanne D on 12/06/01 at 05:21 (066304)

Dear Tammie,
It sounds as if your discussion with your boss was an encouraging start!! I am so proud of you for taking that step! I will hope and pray that any modifications you will be able to make in the amount of time spent on your feet will help you toward healing. I am quite sure that the patients will benefit from your love and caring service no matter if you are sitting or standing! I think I know how much it means to you to be able to contiue your work - and how lost you would be without it - so I am praying that the new adjustments will enable you to be able to continue.
Yes, may we all find PEACE within ourselves, as you said...

Take care!
Suzanne

Re: More applause for Tammie - and a poem

Julie on 12/06/01 at 05:43 (066306)

Tammie, here's some big applause from across the ocean too. I'm glad you've started a dialogue with your boss about what you can and can't do. I feel sure that this is the beginning of good change for you.

Yes, it IS hard to face facts. But when we've faced them, we can accept them and work with them and move on in our lives. And once we start to change, things change around us - not only do we start really helping ourselves, but we get the help we need. You've made a really good start.

Do you know this poem of Goethe's? I posted it once before, over a year ago, and it feels like the right time to post it again - specially for you.

Until there is commitment
There is hesitancy
The chance to draw back
And ineffectiveness.

In all acts of initiative or creation
Ignorance of one elementary truth
Kills countless splendid plans.

The moment one commits oneself
Providence moves too
All sorts of things occur to help
That would otherwise never have occurred.

A stream of events issues forth
From the decision: incidents, meetings
And material assistance not foreseen.

Whatever you can do, or dream you can do,
Begin it.
Boldness has genius, power and magic
Begin it now.

Tammie, you've begun. Congratulations!

Re: More applause for Tammie - and a poem

CArmen H on 12/06/01 at 07:55 (066313)

Good for you for taking control of your life!!!
Don't forget who needs your number one attention....that's you.
Good for you tammie.
Much love from Georgia!

Re: More applause for Tammie - and a poem

Janet C on 12/06/01 at 16:04 (066352)

Dear Tammie,

I'd just like to echo everyone else's postings here... I know what you did must have been very difficult, but I want to congratulate you, Tammie, for speaking with your boss about modifying your job duties. I am so very happy that you found a way to give care to people without having to stand all day! And Julie, that's a wonderful poem, thank you for sharing.

With Love, and Bestest Wishes Always ~ Janet

Re: A General but always from the Heart reply

Tammie on 12/07/01 at 12:02 (066434)

Brian, I leveled with my boss as much as she would hear. She is a busy woman with her own responsabilities. I think she will do what she can to help me as long as it is not intrupting our care plans or not a inconvience to them as this is a business, and of course they do intend to prosper. But I will accept what I can for as long as it lasts. No my troublesome co worker I did not say anything as what would that do ? I am not that way, I feel sorry that she feels the need to hurt me and not understand me or my injury.I hope that she never has to deal with anything like this as I do not wish it for anyone. I will not sink myself to a level of hurting people like she is. I will still try to be a friend to her and hope that in time she will realize I just want to do my job and I do not need to step on toes to hurt someone to feel good about what I do. My reward comes from within hers needs to be felt by those she can impress.Sad for her, so I will pray for her to find her way.

Oh by the way thank u I had not thought of a simple thing like that cutting the pill in half and trying it that makes good sense!!! I will try that, Thank u such a good idea!I had a rough one last night and took as often as I was allowed. I did not work or work today so I hope it calms down for tomorrow. Thanks again ! Hugs to u

Re: Julie

Tammie on 12/07/01 at 12:06 (066435)

Thank u , no I was not familiar with this poem but thank u very much it means allot to me and i prited it out for a helpful reminder. Like I said above to Brian I will be grateful for as long as it lasts and will continue to look for ways to help myself and keep doing what I love. I just wish I would not have been so stubborn and opened my eyes before. But hindsite will not help! Thank u and I am really going to try to make this work !Hugs to u Julie and have a wonderful day!

Re: Carmen

Tammie on 12/07/01 at 12:08 (066437)

You are such a wonderful strong lady I do admire your courage and strenghth! I will try very hard to make this work all the way around as I know if I can keep working it will make allot of things better for me emotionally and of course financialy! The love to u is sent from Ohio and I do hope that you keep up the good work that u do here on the board! Hugs to u

Re: Janet

Tammie on 12/07/01 at 12:12 (066438)

Janet when I made a wish for Laurie I also included you in that as you are a very strong woman to have gone thru all that u have and still stay helping where u can! I am so sorry about your husband being ill it must be terrible to have so much pain in your lives. But I bet that you both are much more intuned to each others pain. May God always be in your lives and send his angels to hear your crys! I do hope that you have a wonderful day! II appreciate all that u have done for me and I wish to return it to someone in need. Love to u and a big hug!

Re: Suzanne

Tammie on 12/07/01 at 12:18 (066440)

Thank u , I am really going to try and make things work! Thanks to all of my good friends here who offer support! And give me the courage I need to take care of myself. Thank u and hugs to u

Re: Beverly

Tammie on 12/07/01 at 12:20 (066441)

I do hope that u are doing better as I had read that u were having some more troubles! I am a nurses aide not a hair stylist lol but we do style hair at work the elderly get there hair washed and set by us with there baths. So we try really hard to make them look nice so they feel good about them selves! Thank u for the support I really needed it and I am grateful for those who care! Hugs to u!

Re: Nancy S and Carole

Tammie on 12/07/01 at 12:24 (066442)

Thank u for the kind words of encouragement! Thank u I needed that it was extreamly hard for me to do and I hope that i dont have to do that again for a bit ! I do tend to be hmmm what would u say hard headed or I guess I just dont like to rely on anyone but myself so very hard when I fail myself, if u can understand what I am trying to say. Sometimes my mind and my words dont match up lol. Thanks u again and I send hugs to u both! And a hope for a wonderful day for both

Re: Laurie

Tammie on 12/07/01 at 12:27 (066443)

Coming from u it is special as u have been here as my friend from the first day I posted here in fright. I remember how supportive u were and told me to feel welcome and that there are wonderful people here and u know what? You were extreamly right! There are many wonderful people and i have made some lifetime friends here!I just hope that others have to ! This is a special board and I for one shall be grateful forever . Love to u laurie and I do hope that you are continuing to have some relief.

Re: Tammie

Julie on 12/07/01 at 14:02 (066455)

I know you are, and you are going to make it work. Forget hindsight and look ahead with hope.

Re: A General but always from the Heart reply

nancy s. on 12/05/01 at 19:50 (066264)

tammie, Good For You and congratulations on your new start, and on what you did for your feet at work today. that's just terrific -- and i bet your patients were just as happy with you as always. i'm so glad to hear that you're trying harder to take care of yourself. i know personally how very difficult it is, but you won't be sorry. again, Good For You -- big applause for tammie is going on here in my little corner of maine!
nancy

Re: Yay, Tammie!

Carole C on 12/05/01 at 20:20 (066266)

We are cheering for you! :) Well done.

Carole

Re: A General but always from the Heart reply

Laurie R on 12/05/01 at 20:30 (066268)

Dear Tammie , YOU DID SOMETHING VERY HARD TODAY AT WORK .....BUT YOU DID IT ... I am so very proud of you and I hope you are proud of yourself .. But you took the first step to help yourself .... I would think your job will help you out . I know they have to know how hard of a worker you are and how very important it is for you to continue to work there.

Just take one day at a time , that is all anyone can ask of you ...

Again I am so very proud of you Tammie ...

Much love to you , Laurie R

Re: A General but always from the Heart reply

Beverly on 12/05/01 at 22:37 (066288)

Tammie, I'm glad you are standing up for what you need.
I didn't realize you were a hair stylist. No wonder you hurt in light of your PF! I can't even stand still in place for more than five minutes.
With your line of work, that involves so much standing still in one place.

I hope you feel better soon with this modified schedule.
Take care,
Beverly

Re: A General but always from the Heart reply

BrianG on 12/05/01 at 23:08 (066293)

Hi Tammy,

I'm real happy you finally leveled with your boss. I wish I could have seen her face whenyou showed her your feet, hahahaa. I hope you took a few minutes to put in a few 'bad' words for your trouble making friend :*)

One last thing about the pain meds. Many people tend to take too much when first starting out, therefore getting that woozy, spaced out feeling. If you can divide your pills, try taking a 1/2 pill, wait 3-4 hours and take the other half. If you do this for a week or so, you will be slowly building up to an amount that will help. We never want to strive to have the pain meds completely eliminate the pain, just enough to take the edge off, and let life become bearable again.

Hopefully the 20th will be very productive for you, good luck.

BCG

Re: A General but always from the Heart reply

Suzanne D on 12/06/01 at 05:21 (066304)

Dear Tammie,
It sounds as if your discussion with your boss was an encouraging start!! I am so proud of you for taking that step! I will hope and pray that any modifications you will be able to make in the amount of time spent on your feet will help you toward healing. I am quite sure that the patients will benefit from your love and caring service no matter if you are sitting or standing! I think I know how much it means to you to be able to contiue your work - and how lost you would be without it - so I am praying that the new adjustments will enable you to be able to continue.
Yes, may we all find PEACE within ourselves, as you said...

Take care!
Suzanne

Re: More applause for Tammie - and a poem

Julie on 12/06/01 at 05:43 (066306)

Tammie, here's some big applause from across the ocean too. I'm glad you've started a dialogue with your boss about what you can and can't do. I feel sure that this is the beginning of good change for you.

Yes, it IS hard to face facts. But when we've faced them, we can accept them and work with them and move on in our lives. And once we start to change, things change around us - not only do we start really helping ourselves, but we get the help we need. You've made a really good start.

Do you know this poem of Goethe's? I posted it once before, over a year ago, and it feels like the right time to post it again - specially for you.

Until there is commitment
There is hesitancy
The chance to draw back
And ineffectiveness.

In all acts of initiative or creation
Ignorance of one elementary truth
Kills countless splendid plans.

The moment one commits oneself
Providence moves too
All sorts of things occur to help
That would otherwise never have occurred.

A stream of events issues forth
From the decision: incidents, meetings
And material assistance not foreseen.

Whatever you can do, or dream you can do,
Begin it.
Boldness has genius, power and magic
Begin it now.

Tammie, you've begun. Congratulations!

Re: More applause for Tammie - and a poem

CArmen H on 12/06/01 at 07:55 (066313)

Good for you for taking control of your life!!!
Don't forget who needs your number one attention....that's you.
Good for you tammie.
Much love from Georgia!

Re: More applause for Tammie - and a poem

Janet C on 12/06/01 at 16:04 (066352)

Dear Tammie,

I'd just like to echo everyone else's postings here... I know what you did must have been very difficult, but I want to congratulate you, Tammie, for speaking with your boss about modifying your job duties. I am so very happy that you found a way to give care to people without having to stand all day! And Julie, that's a wonderful poem, thank you for sharing.

With Love, and Bestest Wishes Always ~ Janet

Re: A General but always from the Heart reply

Tammie on 12/07/01 at 12:02 (066434)

Brian, I leveled with my boss as much as she would hear. She is a busy woman with her own responsabilities. I think she will do what she can to help me as long as it is not intrupting our care plans or not a inconvience to them as this is a business, and of course they do intend to prosper. But I will accept what I can for as long as it lasts. No my troublesome co worker I did not say anything as what would that do ? I am not that way, I feel sorry that she feels the need to hurt me and not understand me or my injury.I hope that she never has to deal with anything like this as I do not wish it for anyone. I will not sink myself to a level of hurting people like she is. I will still try to be a friend to her and hope that in time she will realize I just want to do my job and I do not need to step on toes to hurt someone to feel good about what I do. My reward comes from within hers needs to be felt by those she can impress.Sad for her, so I will pray for her to find her way.

Oh by the way thank u I had not thought of a simple thing like that cutting the pill in half and trying it that makes good sense!!! I will try that, Thank u such a good idea!I had a rough one last night and took as often as I was allowed. I did not work or work today so I hope it calms down for tomorrow. Thanks again ! Hugs to u

Re: Julie

Tammie on 12/07/01 at 12:06 (066435)

Thank u , no I was not familiar with this poem but thank u very much it means allot to me and i prited it out for a helpful reminder. Like I said above to Brian I will be grateful for as long as it lasts and will continue to look for ways to help myself and keep doing what I love. I just wish I would not have been so stubborn and opened my eyes before. But hindsite will not help! Thank u and I am really going to try to make this work !Hugs to u Julie and have a wonderful day!

Re: Carmen

Tammie on 12/07/01 at 12:08 (066437)

You are such a wonderful strong lady I do admire your courage and strenghth! I will try very hard to make this work all the way around as I know if I can keep working it will make allot of things better for me emotionally and of course financialy! The love to u is sent from Ohio and I do hope that you keep up the good work that u do here on the board! Hugs to u

Re: Janet

Tammie on 12/07/01 at 12:12 (066438)

Janet when I made a wish for Laurie I also included you in that as you are a very strong woman to have gone thru all that u have and still stay helping where u can! I am so sorry about your husband being ill it must be terrible to have so much pain in your lives. But I bet that you both are much more intuned to each others pain. May God always be in your lives and send his angels to hear your crys! I do hope that you have a wonderful day! II appreciate all that u have done for me and I wish to return it to someone in need. Love to u and a big hug!

Re: Suzanne

Tammie on 12/07/01 at 12:18 (066440)

Thank u , I am really going to try and make things work! Thanks to all of my good friends here who offer support! And give me the courage I need to take care of myself. Thank u and hugs to u

Re: Beverly

Tammie on 12/07/01 at 12:20 (066441)

I do hope that u are doing better as I had read that u were having some more troubles! I am a nurses aide not a hair stylist lol but we do style hair at work the elderly get there hair washed and set by us with there baths. So we try really hard to make them look nice so they feel good about them selves! Thank u for the support I really needed it and I am grateful for those who care! Hugs to u!

Re: Nancy S and Carole

Tammie on 12/07/01 at 12:24 (066442)

Thank u for the kind words of encouragement! Thank u I needed that it was extreamly hard for me to do and I hope that i dont have to do that again for a bit ! I do tend to be hmmm what would u say hard headed or I guess I just dont like to rely on anyone but myself so very hard when I fail myself, if u can understand what I am trying to say. Sometimes my mind and my words dont match up lol. Thanks u again and I send hugs to u both! And a hope for a wonderful day for both

Re: Laurie

Tammie on 12/07/01 at 12:27 (066443)

Coming from u it is special as u have been here as my friend from the first day I posted here in fright. I remember how supportive u were and told me to feel welcome and that there are wonderful people here and u know what? You were extreamly right! There are many wonderful people and i have made some lifetime friends here!I just hope that others have to ! This is a special board and I for one shall be grateful forever . Love to u laurie and I do hope that you are continuing to have some relief.

Re: Tammie

Julie on 12/07/01 at 14:02 (066455)

I know you are, and you are going to make it work. Forget hindsight and look ahead with hope.