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An oldy but a goody

Posted by wendyn on 1/10/02 at 23:06 (069611)

While doing a search on Monte's question about RSD...I came up with this lovely post from almost 2 years ago. In the interest of humor and humbling myself yet again over this...I repost it now for the benefit of our newcomers.

If you ever find yourself posting something like this on an internet bulletin board - it is an indication that you have become too comfortable with your cyber-friends.

Hope this will make you laugh - can't believe I'm going to share this View Thread
Posted by wendyn on 5/10/00 at 22:38

Sounds like a lot of people have had a crappy day.
In an effort to bring a smile to your face I will share this rather personal, but somewhat humorous, very true situation. What is it they say...'Laugh and the world laughs with you'? Something like that.

About a week ago - I noticed that my legs were getting pretty hairy. Been really busy - I guess? Anyway...I decided that I will bite the bullet and let this hair grow enough to get it waxed. For you men out there or the un-informed, you have to let the hair grow quite a bit first in order for the waxing to work.

After I decided on this marvelous plan, I realized that my long awaited appointment with the foot and ankle surgeon is Thursday (now tomorrow). I made the appointment for the waxing for today (the day before).

To my great horror - I was advised by the good waxing people - that the hair on my legs, although obscenely long, is not long _enough_ to wax. I have to wait another week.

Thus, I am going for my first meeting with this doctor tomorrow morning - looking somewhat like an ape. I am positively mortified. I cannot think of a way to hide this abomination. I seriously debated shaving it all off, but then I'd have to start all over again and this is not a lot of fun (it's actually REALLY gross - ask my husband). I also considered postponing the appointment with the surgeon, but I've been waiting since November to see this guy. So, vanity will have to lose out this time.

I intend to casually mention to him that I don't usually look like this - but after all, it is hockey playoffs and NO ONE shaves during playoffs. I will leave it at that I think.

:)

Re: An oldy but a goody

Carmen on 1/11/02 at 11:28 (069632)

HILARIOUS!
You are so funny Wendy. I howled at that one!
Thanks for sharing....
by the way..how did it turn out with the dic? did you tell him?

Re: An oldy but a goody

wendyn on 1/11/02 at 13:14 (069637)

Carmen - actually he was a bit of a dic - but I think you mean doc.

He did see my rather hairy ankles - but he did not comment. And I did not actually die from the embarassment.

Re: An oldy but a goody

michael b on 1/11/02 at 13:30 (069638)

a tremendous post ------ the ongoing battle between women and vanity . . . . reminds me of the time we were going to the hospital to prepare for the delivery of our 1st child. my wife's water breaks at 12:30 a.m. (i had just fallen asleep, of course), and the mad scramble begins : i get dressed, get the suitcase in the car, map is ready for the hospital route, etc.etc, and i'm waiting on, of all things, my wife. 'where the**** are you?!?!' i shout from the front door entrance. a reply comes from way back in the master bathroom 'i'll be there in a minute'. 30 seconds goes by, then a full minute or so --- i'm now thinking we're too late and she's birthing the child in the tub. not able to stand the pressure of the unknown any longer, i haul back to the bedroom hoping that i will receive divine intervention on how to be a midwife --- she then emerges from the bathroom. ' what the ***** are you doing??? ' i say as my legacy hangs in the balance. 'i had to take care of something' she says . 'what's more important than getting to the hospital 15 minutes ago???' says i. the reply (and i quote verbatium) 'i'm not going anywhere without my makeup on.' some things are not meant for me to understand . . . . . . . . . .

Re: An oldy but a goody

Carmen on 1/11/02 at 13:43 (069641)

Oh my gosh that is so funny!!!!
My mom would be the same way. EXACTLY. I however am more like 'Do I HAVE to wear make up?'
Yuck...I get ready for anything in 15 minutes.

Re: An oldy but a goody

michael b on 1/11/02 at 15:21 (069659)

it's what i get for marrying a sorority girl

Re: :-)

Suzanne D on 1/11/02 at 15:23 (069660)

Thanks for the smiles, Wendy and Michael! I enjoyed both your stories! Made me think back almost 21 years when my oldest daughter was born...My husband kept saying over and over in the labor room, 'This isn't NEARLY as bad as I thought it would be, is it?!' I managed to be nice until about the umpteenth time he said it when I responded with, 'Shut up!' That hurt his feelings, so then I had to try to smooth THAT over so he wouldn't leave! :-)

Re: :-)

michael b on 1/12/02 at 10:29 (069736)

our labor w/ this child is a another story in and of itself. . . . . suffice it to say that the nicest thing said to me was 'shut up'.

Re: :-)

JudyS on 1/12/02 at 19:08 (069805)

Speaking of delivery-room anecdotes...........things were going OK for us that particular day when the usual labor stuff took place.....and my husband was absolutely perfect at massaging my lower back with every yukky contraction. The relief of each massage was largely due to the fact that his hands were wonderfully cool to the touch and boy was that nice. He was feeling pretty proud of his contribution with each contraction until, inevitably, his hands warmed up and I just couldn't stand it (not to mention that those pesky contractions had the nerve to get STRONGER!). He didn't know that - he jumped faithfully to the task each time until finally I, through seriously clenched teeth, told him in no uncertain terms to keep his %$#@*&$ hands off me! Poor guy. Isn't it a wonder he even came home with me after our son was born?

Re: :-)

Carole C on 1/12/02 at 21:10 (069817)

Judy, when I had my daughter many years ago, at one point my husband (now ex) was talking to me, trying to make light conversation and calm me down, I suppose, when I told him that I loved him but asked him to please leave because I was BUSY!!! LOL

Well it seems pretty humorous to me now but at the time it was all I could do to focus and try to deal with each contraction. Within an hour after that, I had delivered a nine and a half pound little girl with all of her fingers, and toes, and totally precious.

Carole C

Re: :-)

John h on 1/14/02 at 16:21 (069981)

mary was fortunate. we arrived at the hospital in New Jersey. The nurse rolled her into wherever they take you and 10 minutes later we had a daughter.

Re: An oldy but a goody

Carmen on 1/11/02 at 11:28 (069632)

HILARIOUS!
You are so funny Wendy. I howled at that one!
Thanks for sharing....
by the way..how did it turn out with the dic? did you tell him?

Re: An oldy but a goody

wendyn on 1/11/02 at 13:14 (069637)

Carmen - actually he was a bit of a dic - but I think you mean doc.

He did see my rather hairy ankles - but he did not comment. And I did not actually die from the embarassment.

Re: An oldy but a goody

michael b on 1/11/02 at 13:30 (069638)

a tremendous post ------ the ongoing battle between women and vanity . . . . reminds me of the time we were going to the hospital to prepare for the delivery of our 1st child. my wife's water breaks at 12:30 a.m. (i had just fallen asleep, of course), and the mad scramble begins : i get dressed, get the suitcase in the car, map is ready for the hospital route, etc.etc, and i'm waiting on, of all things, my wife. 'where the**** are you?!?!' i shout from the front door entrance. a reply comes from way back in the master bathroom 'i'll be there in a minute'. 30 seconds goes by, then a full minute or so --- i'm now thinking we're too late and she's birthing the child in the tub. not able to stand the pressure of the unknown any longer, i haul back to the bedroom hoping that i will receive divine intervention on how to be a midwife --- she then emerges from the bathroom. ' what the ***** are you doing??? ' i say as my legacy hangs in the balance. 'i had to take care of something' she says . 'what's more important than getting to the hospital 15 minutes ago???' says i. the reply (and i quote verbatium) 'i'm not going anywhere without my makeup on.' some things are not meant for me to understand . . . . . . . . . .

Re: An oldy but a goody

Carmen on 1/11/02 at 13:43 (069641)

Oh my gosh that is so funny!!!!
My mom would be the same way. EXACTLY. I however am more like 'Do I HAVE to wear make up?'
Yuck...I get ready for anything in 15 minutes.

Re: An oldy but a goody

michael b on 1/11/02 at 15:21 (069659)

it's what i get for marrying a sorority girl

Re: :-)

Suzanne D on 1/11/02 at 15:23 (069660)

Thanks for the smiles, Wendy and Michael! I enjoyed both your stories! Made me think back almost 21 years when my oldest daughter was born...My husband kept saying over and over in the labor room, 'This isn't NEARLY as bad as I thought it would be, is it?!' I managed to be nice until about the umpteenth time he said it when I responded with, 'Shut up!' That hurt his feelings, so then I had to try to smooth THAT over so he wouldn't leave! :-)

Re: :-)

michael b on 1/12/02 at 10:29 (069736)

our labor w/ this child is a another story in and of itself. . . . . suffice it to say that the nicest thing said to me was 'shut up'.

Re: :-)

JudyS on 1/12/02 at 19:08 (069805)

Speaking of delivery-room anecdotes...........things were going OK for us that particular day when the usual labor stuff took place.....and my husband was absolutely perfect at massaging my lower back with every yukky contraction. The relief of each massage was largely due to the fact that his hands were wonderfully cool to the touch and boy was that nice. He was feeling pretty proud of his contribution with each contraction until, inevitably, his hands warmed up and I just couldn't stand it (not to mention that those pesky contractions had the nerve to get STRONGER!). He didn't know that - he jumped faithfully to the task each time until finally I, through seriously clenched teeth, told him in no uncertain terms to keep his %$#@*&$ hands off me! Poor guy. Isn't it a wonder he even came home with me after our son was born?

Re: :-)

Carole C on 1/12/02 at 21:10 (069817)

Judy, when I had my daughter many years ago, at one point my husband (now ex) was talking to me, trying to make light conversation and calm me down, I suppose, when I told him that I loved him but asked him to please leave because I was BUSY!!! LOL

Well it seems pretty humorous to me now but at the time it was all I could do to focus and try to deal with each contraction. Within an hour after that, I had delivered a nine and a half pound little girl with all of her fingers, and toes, and totally precious.

Carole C

Re: :-)

John h on 1/14/02 at 16:21 (069981)

mary was fortunate. we arrived at the hospital in New Jersey. The nurse rolled her into wherever they take you and 10 minutes later we had a daughter.