Home The Book Dr Articles Products Message Boards Journal Articles Search Our Surveys Surgery ESWT Dr Messages Find Good Drs video

Has anyone ever noticed...

Posted by Carmen on 4/10/02 at 07:57 (079029)

that new people and sometimes even old people post these long posts about their conditions, concerns, feelings, pain etc. ask for advice or help and then us OLD folks pop on and do our best to answer and go crazy with ideas and sympathy and that person NEVER returns or answers our posts?
Or is it just me?
I think of these types of posts as 'learning tools' for us.

Re: Has anyone ever noticed...

Rich on 4/10/02 at 08:09 (079032)

Well, I for one am thankful of your replies with ideas and suggestions! I do try to reply when my little ones are not climbing all over me!

And I hope new and old refers only to our length of posting!! LOL

Today is one of those coffee/computer mornings!! Can you relate?
Rich

Re: Has anyone ever noticed...

Tammie on 4/10/02 at 08:14 (079033)

Gosh I hope that i am not doing that , I like to help if I can , but for some reason I dont feel comfortable with the knowledge area, I more like to help with the emotional side and that side of things as I am still learning so much and am not sure if I know enough to help anyone and afraid I might say something wrong!

Sometimes I refrain from saying anything as I dont know what to say or I havent checked in ,or I just want to lurk and read about how things are going for everyone! It is interesting to observe threads, I have learned alot! Sometimes I really feel as I know each of you personaly, It is a nice feeling! I hope you are feeling ok Carmen as I know how very hard you have been working on finding the answers to your troubles. I also should Thank u for your links you post I always look at them and sometimes get so engrossed with what I read I never get back on the board to say thanks, so I am now! You surly have given alot of good info. Take care and looking foward to reading your posts! I just feel that people have lives besides the board and sometimes they need a break or just are plain tired of dealing with this and need to just sit back and observe for a bit. I have been thinking about Barb in texas and wondering how she is I have not seen her post in a long time I hope she is well, I know she was having a tough time. I also think some of us talk alot thru aol or email!Do you have that aol? We would love to have you join us! Lately I kinda have been busy working on getting myself in some level of stronger to face things and help myself. Plus the hubby has been having trouble with that darn knee of his funny we could use a left leg him the knee me the foot lol andy offers haha, we were thinking bionic would be nice! Ok enough from me I have to take care of the hubby he may be hungry a very good sign lol!

Re: Has anyone ever noticed...

Laurie R on 4/10/02 at 08:42 (079040)

I also have noticed this . Their is one special teen that came on this board and asked for advised and came took it then had her surgery and came back to let us know how she was doing . Now that is respect .... Yes I am talking about Jessica .... She was just a doll and I was so glad to see her feeling better.

I ahve taken time to explain things for a first time poster and then they never come back ... Maybe they don't like what they hear. I am not sure . Or maybe they get scared.. We are not doctors , but we do go through the pain everyday ... I get most if not all my info from people that have the same as I do .

But everyone is different . But I do understand what you are saying.

Oh Tammie , not you in any way , you offer so much to this board , without you and your compassion , it would not be the same ....

I hope your hubby is feeling well today , keep giving him his pain meds ..LOL

Laurie R

Re: Has anyone ever noticed...

dave on 4/10/02 at 09:51 (079047)

Do any of you have trouble with your achilles? Since i have developed pf i have been unable to stretch properly. I am only able to stretch a little. If i over do it i have alot of pain at the back of my heel where it attaches. I believe that this is a result from the cortizone shots that i had three years age. The only relief that i ever get from it is if i stop stretching all together. You know what that means. My plantar fasciitis comes back in full force

Re: Has anyone ever noticed...

Sharon W on 4/10/02 at 10:19 (079050)

Carmen,

I understand what you're saying but some people only want to get something off their chest, or only need some advice from others who have 'been there,' and really do not want to get involved in a message board. Yes, probably some of those people are simply so ungrateful that it never occurs to them to write back and say, 'Thanks.' They may be selfish or they may simply be too preoccupied, at that moment, with their own problems, depression, or pain. Others may be a bit embarassed, after revealing so much of their personal problems publically on a message board! But I am sure there are many of them who do remember the help they received and continue to look in on this site now and then, invisibly grateful for the kind words and useful information that helped them on their way.

-- Sharon

Re: Has anyone ever noticed...

JudyS on 4/10/02 at 10:56 (079056)

Dave, it sounds as though you've hit on the solution - for the time being, anyway. It's not unusual to get achilles soreness as a result of following doctor's orders to stretch the calf muscle more. The Achilles is pretty thoroughly involved in general calf stretches. Possibly all you need to do is lighten up the stretches as opposed to eliminating them altogether. Weight-bearing stretches tend to exacerbate things (like the good old wall stretch...) so it helps to passively stretch instead - perhaps with a towel looped around the ball of your foot while you're sitting on the floor, or even just by holding your foot in your hands and manipulating it in to a flex-like position. Also, sometimes folks who wear Birks a lot find a little Achilles soreness.

Re: Has anyone ever noticed...

dave on 4/10/02 at 11:10 (079058)

Thanks Judy, i will give that a shot

Re: Has anyone ever noticed...

Suzanne D on 4/10/02 at 12:49 (079073)

Dear Carmen,

'Been there; done that' as the saying goes! :-)

One particular time, someone wrote such a heart-rending tale and left their e-mail address. I really worked hard to write an e-mail as quickly as possible, but never heard from her in reply or on the board. I hope it helped. If not, well...I would rather err on the side of going out on the limb for someone and get no response than to withhold from someone who might really need my help.

I guess it just makes us appreciate all the more those people who DO respond back to us!

Suzanne :-)

Re: Yep

wendyn on 4/10/02 at 12:51 (079074)

Happens all the time...

Re: Rich

Carmen on 4/10/02 at 14:02 (079087)

EVERY morning is one of those. ;-)

Re: Has anyone ever noticed...

Nicole K. on 4/10/02 at 14:25 (079090)

hmmm... I think I may have done that. I oftentimes read through the posts but don't have any suggestions to make/ or suggestions have been made. As far as coming back and updating; I don't do that as well because this never seems to go away, and just when I think I start to feel better I feel worse and it's all an uphill battle. This summer will be 8 yrs. for me with PF. :( I am so glad I found this board and I am so glad that you are here and that I can come here any time I want for support and information.

Re: THANK YOU ! ---- yes, i have been preoccupied w/ my own problems right now and also i am very shy .

linda a on 4/10/02 at 18:08 (079123)

hello to everyone ! that was very well put sharon . i am one of those grateful people out here in cyberspace , who received alot of informational and emotional support from this site . i do not post often , because i am so shy . i am not much of a talker . i lack the social graces . i do love reading the message board . lately i stopped e-mailing laurie and a few other good friends . been down about my job . well , here it goes Linda's sad story on life . well my feet never got better ( not the 100 --- 50 % that i was hoping )from having surgery ( P.F. and tarsal tunnel release )last August 2001 . i am in that < 50 % better category just dealing w/ the pain the best way i know how ( just antimflammatory pills ). yes, i am getting used to even the foot cramps that come about around the ball of the foot to the toes . i have always loved my position as anesthesia technician , but recently i have been trying to fight for this job back . i wasn't going to post about my 'dirty laundry' , but maybe now i need the emotional support . if you do not know i am bipolar and have other baggage as well . i was sexually assaulted in august 2001 , but i never pressed charges against the sales rep , who came to my house to give me est. for storm windows . after the assault other old memories of childhood abuse began to resurface ( had those tucked faraway , so i could deal w/ life ) . since august i have not been able to deal w/ life . yes , i am ashamed that i tried to take my life to end all my problems . after hospitalization i got my usual 'return to work statement ' signed by the good psych doc . now mgmt says i must do other things to return to work . have a statement prepared by my counselor and a saftey plan signed . i agreed to everything hoping that i would be able to return to work . i was told on monday that i needed a second opinion performed by another psych doc on whether i should be able to return to work . mgmt also wants me to take another position outside the surgery dept . i do not wish to give up my positon that i have been performing for over 11 yrs . my 2nd appt is tomorrow . today w/ the help of my sister i went to the courthouse to press charges against the sales rep . so , you see i have alot of things on my plate . oh , i forgot the big mess w/ the short term disabily insurance not paying me . they said , there was a computer glitch . thank you for allowing me to vent . linda ( Ky )

Re: THANK YOU ! ---- yes, i have been preoccupied w/ my own problems right now and also i am very shy .

Carmen on 4/10/02 at 18:53 (079131)

Linda~
YOU keep on hanging in there for life! You have some wonderful things to do here on earth...do not be ashamed of your past actions but keep your head up...up high.
Obviously there are bigger things meant for you than to die at this time in your life..
So you fight for your rights as a human being and against what this person did to you. Hang in there.....do not be defeated by anyone or anything...especially yourself.
We'rehere if you need us.
any time any day.

Re: THANK YOU ! ---- yes, i have been preoccupied w/ my own problems right now and also i am very shy .

Sharon W on 4/10/02 at 19:39 (079136)

Linda,

We have something in common -- we both worked in the medical field! But you had a much cooler job, as an anesthesia tech; I was just an LVN. (I guess, technically, I still AM an LVN -- I still have my liscence -- but I know it is very unlikely I will ever be able to work on my feet again. )

You are braver than I am, though; I never even TRIED to get disability. In fact, I never told any of the nurses I worked with what was wrong -- I was afraid that they might criticize me behind my back, for 'whining about sore feet'. And when I decided to quit, I figured that if I got enough better to go looking for another nursing job, I didn't want anybody who might be giving me references to know ANYTHING about chronic foot problems...

We have something else in common -- you have the same name as my sister-in-law, and she is such a special person we named our second daughter -- Linda -- after her.

Here you are, dealing with pain AND depression AND the trauma of a terrible assault AND the possiblilty of losing your job -- what a heavy burden to bear! Feel free to write to me any time you need a listening ear; my address is

(email removed)

-- Sharon

Re: THANK YOU ! ---- yes, i have been preoccupied w/ my own problems right now and also i am very shy .

Sharon W on 4/10/02 at 20:19 (079144)

Linda,

I meant to add that I also admire your courage in trying to handle that pile of paperwork so you can return to work, when you are still trying to deal with all of these serious problems in your life, as well! Have your feet actually gotten enough better that you feel you can handle it now, or are you returning because your temporary diasability is running out and you are 'up against the wall' because you need an income and continuing health insurance?

-- Sharon

Re: Linda you are a survivor

Tammie on 4/10/02 at 20:37 (079152)

Our dear friend, I thought maybe something was wrong as i had not heard from you lately in email. I am so sorry that life is dealing you so much pain to go through! Life is very hard anyways and then to have extra dumped on you makes it a bigger challenge!

You are much stronger then you give yourself credit for! I understand some of what you have shared here as my life had some similar situations also, but I like to think of being a survivor and much stronger for it! You were very brave to file a report that was a very hard step to take and my friend I am so very proud that you did this, do you know that you may have saved many other inoccent victims from suffering as you are. You should be aplauded for this . Thanks to you and your braveness some other women may be protected. As for leaving this life, Linda I understand that again I can relate to those feelings been there done that survived and moved on! I recently had to deall with this again and I went and found help and you know what ? I felt good to be able to know that I was at a point that I needed someone to help me. That is progress also. So my dear you are making progress if you can acknowledge this. Linda life is a blessing and God wants you to do his work, each day that you rise up and get threw the day is his way of thanking you for doing a good days work.

It might not be at a job per say, but maybe it was the way you smiled at some one or maybe the way youtook care of your animals as they are his creatures. It might be something very simple that you do but he is giving you the gift of waking up tomorrow and the gift of the friends here on this board that really care about you! As well as your sister who obviously loves you very much. Linda we are here for you as we dip the wings and scoop you up and hold you tightly as you get thru this hurdle and feel strong enough to get back on your feet. I know you must feel awful about your job, but maybe this is in Gods plan for you, maybe there is something special that he wishes you to do for him. Be patient and try to take a day at a time and talk to those that can help you and support you thru this hard time. Counseling is very good I think I liked what they called group therapy, it had several people who expieranced similar things in life and talking and listening and trying to get your self esteem back is alot easier when there are people around you who have been there such as like this foot board! Check into it it really is nice. Ok my friend I must go as my hubby needs his nurse, smiling I say this as this nurse is pretty tired. So please know that we are here for you anyway that you need us. I pray that tomorrow will be better and the next day will be better yet and then the next and next and soon you will realize that you are special and you have a place here in life and you are loved and you make a difference and you are not a bad person and God is smiling down on you and loves you as well! Love to you and you know my email if you need a friend or a shoulder!

Re: Linda you are a survivor

Necee on 4/10/02 at 23:09 (079180)

Wow Tammie, you said it beautifully!
Linda, I just want to echo what Tammie said to you, and let you know that we are here to listen anytime you wish to vent.
You have endured some very traumatic times in your life, but don't allow those events to consume you.
Take each new day and lean on God, he will never leave you. Just when you think you can't take it anymore, he will give you the strength and the courage to overcome.
I truly admire you Linda for opening up and not letting all that extra baggage eat at your soul. Getting it out and pressing charges is the first step to your recovery. Just know that you are not alone, we are here for you in love, support, friendship and prayers.
All the best dear friend,
Necee

Re: Linda you are a survivor RE LINDA AND TAMMIE

Laurie R on 4/10/02 at 23:47 (079185)

Hi ladies , Tammie your post to Linda was just beautiful ..... Linda we are your friends and we won't judge you in any way . What happen to you IS NOT YOUR FAULT .... You are a very strong person even if you don't feel so now .... We are here for you anytime ....

Much love to you always , Laurie R

Re: THANK YOU ! ---- yes, i have been preoccupied w/ my own problems right now and also i am very shy .

JudyS on 4/11/02 at 09:49 (079211)

Linda, it's been said before - probably the greatest thing about these message boards is that any one of us can 'vent' to any degree we want and know that it's a safe place to do so.......so hey, keep venting, it's good for you!
It's funny how we all think we have a 'full plate' on a daily basis then we find out that our plate could be full of other things that are even heavier and it looks like that's your plate right now.
I really appreciate the way you write and, in all honesty, it really seems like you have more of a handle on things than you think you do. Your words are strong, concise and methodical - they show that your thinking is just the same. And something else, you may feel that you've 'vented' here, and you have (we all have - more than once!) but you've also been a strong, helping entity here many times. This is just a moment in time when we get to return the favor so thanks for letting us in to your life today - it's good for us!

Re: THANK YOU ! ---- yes, i have been preoccupied w/ my own problems right now and also i am very shy .

john h on 4/11/02 at 09:56 (079212)

Linda: I wish had some great words to make you feel better. I will suggest that you take life one day at a time or to live in the moment. If you can try not to get bogged down in next week, next month, or next year. Are there any support groups in your area? I would suspect that your hospital social services department may have a list of support groups. Have you seen the move 'A Beautiful Mind'? People do have a way of getting better and surviving no matter how bad things seem at the moment. Keep on expressing your feelings with all on the board as there are a large group of people pulling and praying for your recovery to a better life.

Re: Has anyone ever noticed...

Rich on 4/10/02 at 08:09 (079032)

Well, I for one am thankful of your replies with ideas and suggestions! I do try to reply when my little ones are not climbing all over me!

And I hope new and old refers only to our length of posting!! LOL

Today is one of those coffee/computer mornings!! Can you relate?
Rich

Re: Has anyone ever noticed...

Tammie on 4/10/02 at 08:14 (079033)

Gosh I hope that i am not doing that , I like to help if I can , but for some reason I dont feel comfortable with the knowledge area, I more like to help with the emotional side and that side of things as I am still learning so much and am not sure if I know enough to help anyone and afraid I might say something wrong!

Sometimes I refrain from saying anything as I dont know what to say or I havent checked in ,or I just want to lurk and read about how things are going for everyone! It is interesting to observe threads, I have learned alot! Sometimes I really feel as I know each of you personaly, It is a nice feeling! I hope you are feeling ok Carmen as I know how very hard you have been working on finding the answers to your troubles. I also should Thank u for your links you post I always look at them and sometimes get so engrossed with what I read I never get back on the board to say thanks, so I am now! You surly have given alot of good info. Take care and looking foward to reading your posts! I just feel that people have lives besides the board and sometimes they need a break or just are plain tired of dealing with this and need to just sit back and observe for a bit. I have been thinking about Barb in texas and wondering how she is I have not seen her post in a long time I hope she is well, I know she was having a tough time. I also think some of us talk alot thru aol or email!Do you have that aol? We would love to have you join us! Lately I kinda have been busy working on getting myself in some level of stronger to face things and help myself. Plus the hubby has been having trouble with that darn knee of his funny we could use a left leg him the knee me the foot lol andy offers haha, we were thinking bionic would be nice! Ok enough from me I have to take care of the hubby he may be hungry a very good sign lol!

Re: Has anyone ever noticed...

Laurie R on 4/10/02 at 08:42 (079040)

I also have noticed this . Their is one special teen that came on this board and asked for advised and came took it then had her surgery and came back to let us know how she was doing . Now that is respect .... Yes I am talking about Jessica .... She was just a doll and I was so glad to see her feeling better.

I ahve taken time to explain things for a first time poster and then they never come back ... Maybe they don't like what they hear. I am not sure . Or maybe they get scared.. We are not doctors , but we do go through the pain everyday ... I get most if not all my info from people that have the same as I do .

But everyone is different . But I do understand what you are saying.

Oh Tammie , not you in any way , you offer so much to this board , without you and your compassion , it would not be the same ....

I hope your hubby is feeling well today , keep giving him his pain meds ..LOL

Laurie R

Re: Has anyone ever noticed...

dave on 4/10/02 at 09:51 (079047)

Do any of you have trouble with your achilles? Since i have developed pf i have been unable to stretch properly. I am only able to stretch a little. If i over do it i have alot of pain at the back of my heel where it attaches. I believe that this is a result from the cortizone shots that i had three years age. The only relief that i ever get from it is if i stop stretching all together. You know what that means. My plantar fasciitis comes back in full force

Re: Has anyone ever noticed...

Sharon W on 4/10/02 at 10:19 (079050)

Carmen,

I understand what you're saying but some people only want to get something off their chest, or only need some advice from others who have 'been there,' and really do not want to get involved in a message board. Yes, probably some of those people are simply so ungrateful that it never occurs to them to write back and say, 'Thanks.' They may be selfish or they may simply be too preoccupied, at that moment, with their own problems, depression, or pain. Others may be a bit embarassed, after revealing so much of their personal problems publically on a message board! But I am sure there are many of them who do remember the help they received and continue to look in on this site now and then, invisibly grateful for the kind words and useful information that helped them on their way.

-- Sharon

Re: Has anyone ever noticed...

JudyS on 4/10/02 at 10:56 (079056)

Dave, it sounds as though you've hit on the solution - for the time being, anyway. It's not unusual to get achilles soreness as a result of following doctor's orders to stretch the calf muscle more. The Achilles is pretty thoroughly involved in general calf stretches. Possibly all you need to do is lighten up the stretches as opposed to eliminating them altogether. Weight-bearing stretches tend to exacerbate things (like the good old wall stretch...) so it helps to passively stretch instead - perhaps with a towel looped around the ball of your foot while you're sitting on the floor, or even just by holding your foot in your hands and manipulating it in to a flex-like position. Also, sometimes folks who wear Birks a lot find a little Achilles soreness.

Re: Has anyone ever noticed...

dave on 4/10/02 at 11:10 (079058)

Thanks Judy, i will give that a shot

Re: Has anyone ever noticed...

Suzanne D on 4/10/02 at 12:49 (079073)

Dear Carmen,

'Been there; done that' as the saying goes! :-)

One particular time, someone wrote such a heart-rending tale and left their e-mail address. I really worked hard to write an e-mail as quickly as possible, but never heard from her in reply or on the board. I hope it helped. If not, well...I would rather err on the side of going out on the limb for someone and get no response than to withhold from someone who might really need my help.

I guess it just makes us appreciate all the more those people who DO respond back to us!

Suzanne :-)

Re: Yep

wendyn on 4/10/02 at 12:51 (079074)

Happens all the time...

Re: Rich

Carmen on 4/10/02 at 14:02 (079087)

EVERY morning is one of those. ;-)

Re: Has anyone ever noticed...

Nicole K. on 4/10/02 at 14:25 (079090)

hmmm... I think I may have done that. I oftentimes read through the posts but don't have any suggestions to make/ or suggestions have been made. As far as coming back and updating; I don't do that as well because this never seems to go away, and just when I think I start to feel better I feel worse and it's all an uphill battle. This summer will be 8 yrs. for me with PF. :( I am so glad I found this board and I am so glad that you are here and that I can come here any time I want for support and information.

Re: THANK YOU ! ---- yes, i have been preoccupied w/ my own problems right now and also i am very shy .

linda a on 4/10/02 at 18:08 (079123)

hello to everyone ! that was very well put sharon . i am one of those grateful people out here in cyberspace , who received alot of informational and emotional support from this site . i do not post often , because i am so shy . i am not much of a talker . i lack the social graces . i do love reading the message board . lately i stopped e-mailing laurie and a few other good friends . been down about my job . well , here it goes Linda's sad story on life . well my feet never got better ( not the 100 --- 50 % that i was hoping )from having surgery ( P.F. and tarsal tunnel release )last August 2001 . i am in that < 50 % better category just dealing w/ the pain the best way i know how ( just antimflammatory pills ). yes, i am getting used to even the foot cramps that come about around the ball of the foot to the toes . i have always loved my position as anesthesia technician , but recently i have been trying to fight for this job back . i wasn't going to post about my 'dirty laundry' , but maybe now i need the emotional support . if you do not know i am bipolar and have other baggage as well . i was sexually assaulted in august 2001 , but i never pressed charges against the sales rep , who came to my house to give me est. for storm windows . after the assault other old memories of childhood abuse began to resurface ( had those tucked faraway , so i could deal w/ life ) . since august i have not been able to deal w/ life . yes , i am ashamed that i tried to take my life to end all my problems . after hospitalization i got my usual 'return to work statement ' signed by the good psych doc . now mgmt says i must do other things to return to work . have a statement prepared by my counselor and a saftey plan signed . i agreed to everything hoping that i would be able to return to work . i was told on monday that i needed a second opinion performed by another psych doc on whether i should be able to return to work . mgmt also wants me to take another position outside the surgery dept . i do not wish to give up my positon that i have been performing for over 11 yrs . my 2nd appt is tomorrow . today w/ the help of my sister i went to the courthouse to press charges against the sales rep . so , you see i have alot of things on my plate . oh , i forgot the big mess w/ the short term disabily insurance not paying me . they said , there was a computer glitch . thank you for allowing me to vent . linda ( Ky )

Re: THANK YOU ! ---- yes, i have been preoccupied w/ my own problems right now and also i am very shy .

Carmen on 4/10/02 at 18:53 (079131)

Linda~
YOU keep on hanging in there for life! You have some wonderful things to do here on earth...do not be ashamed of your past actions but keep your head up...up high.
Obviously there are bigger things meant for you than to die at this time in your life..
So you fight for your rights as a human being and against what this person did to you. Hang in there.....do not be defeated by anyone or anything...especially yourself.
We'rehere if you need us.
any time any day.

Re: THANK YOU ! ---- yes, i have been preoccupied w/ my own problems right now and also i am very shy .

Sharon W on 4/10/02 at 19:39 (079136)

Linda,

We have something in common -- we both worked in the medical field! But you had a much cooler job, as an anesthesia tech; I was just an LVN. (I guess, technically, I still AM an LVN -- I still have my liscence -- but I know it is very unlikely I will ever be able to work on my feet again. )

You are braver than I am, though; I never even TRIED to get disability. In fact, I never told any of the nurses I worked with what was wrong -- I was afraid that they might criticize me behind my back, for 'whining about sore feet'. And when I decided to quit, I figured that if I got enough better to go looking for another nursing job, I didn't want anybody who might be giving me references to know ANYTHING about chronic foot problems...

We have something else in common -- you have the same name as my sister-in-law, and she is such a special person we named our second daughter -- Linda -- after her.

Here you are, dealing with pain AND depression AND the trauma of a terrible assault AND the possiblilty of losing your job -- what a heavy burden to bear! Feel free to write to me any time you need a listening ear; my address is

(email removed)

-- Sharon

Re: THANK YOU ! ---- yes, i have been preoccupied w/ my own problems right now and also i am very shy .

Sharon W on 4/10/02 at 20:19 (079144)

Linda,

I meant to add that I also admire your courage in trying to handle that pile of paperwork so you can return to work, when you are still trying to deal with all of these serious problems in your life, as well! Have your feet actually gotten enough better that you feel you can handle it now, or are you returning because your temporary diasability is running out and you are 'up against the wall' because you need an income and continuing health insurance?

-- Sharon

Re: Linda you are a survivor

Tammie on 4/10/02 at 20:37 (079152)

Our dear friend, I thought maybe something was wrong as i had not heard from you lately in email. I am so sorry that life is dealing you so much pain to go through! Life is very hard anyways and then to have extra dumped on you makes it a bigger challenge!

You are much stronger then you give yourself credit for! I understand some of what you have shared here as my life had some similar situations also, but I like to think of being a survivor and much stronger for it! You were very brave to file a report that was a very hard step to take and my friend I am so very proud that you did this, do you know that you may have saved many other inoccent victims from suffering as you are. You should be aplauded for this . Thanks to you and your braveness some other women may be protected. As for leaving this life, Linda I understand that again I can relate to those feelings been there done that survived and moved on! I recently had to deall with this again and I went and found help and you know what ? I felt good to be able to know that I was at a point that I needed someone to help me. That is progress also. So my dear you are making progress if you can acknowledge this. Linda life is a blessing and God wants you to do his work, each day that you rise up and get threw the day is his way of thanking you for doing a good days work.

It might not be at a job per say, but maybe it was the way you smiled at some one or maybe the way youtook care of your animals as they are his creatures. It might be something very simple that you do but he is giving you the gift of waking up tomorrow and the gift of the friends here on this board that really care about you! As well as your sister who obviously loves you very much. Linda we are here for you as we dip the wings and scoop you up and hold you tightly as you get thru this hurdle and feel strong enough to get back on your feet. I know you must feel awful about your job, but maybe this is in Gods plan for you, maybe there is something special that he wishes you to do for him. Be patient and try to take a day at a time and talk to those that can help you and support you thru this hard time. Counseling is very good I think I liked what they called group therapy, it had several people who expieranced similar things in life and talking and listening and trying to get your self esteem back is alot easier when there are people around you who have been there such as like this foot board! Check into it it really is nice. Ok my friend I must go as my hubby needs his nurse, smiling I say this as this nurse is pretty tired. So please know that we are here for you anyway that you need us. I pray that tomorrow will be better and the next day will be better yet and then the next and next and soon you will realize that you are special and you have a place here in life and you are loved and you make a difference and you are not a bad person and God is smiling down on you and loves you as well! Love to you and you know my email if you need a friend or a shoulder!

Re: Linda you are a survivor

Necee on 4/10/02 at 23:09 (079180)

Wow Tammie, you said it beautifully!
Linda, I just want to echo what Tammie said to you, and let you know that we are here to listen anytime you wish to vent.
You have endured some very traumatic times in your life, but don't allow those events to consume you.
Take each new day and lean on God, he will never leave you. Just when you think you can't take it anymore, he will give you the strength and the courage to overcome.
I truly admire you Linda for opening up and not letting all that extra baggage eat at your soul. Getting it out and pressing charges is the first step to your recovery. Just know that you are not alone, we are here for you in love, support, friendship and prayers.
All the best dear friend,
Necee

Re: Linda you are a survivor RE LINDA AND TAMMIE

Laurie R on 4/10/02 at 23:47 (079185)

Hi ladies , Tammie your post to Linda was just beautiful ..... Linda we are your friends and we won't judge you in any way . What happen to you IS NOT YOUR FAULT .... You are a very strong person even if you don't feel so now .... We are here for you anytime ....

Much love to you always , Laurie R

Re: THANK YOU ! ---- yes, i have been preoccupied w/ my own problems right now and also i am very shy .

JudyS on 4/11/02 at 09:49 (079211)

Linda, it's been said before - probably the greatest thing about these message boards is that any one of us can 'vent' to any degree we want and know that it's a safe place to do so.......so hey, keep venting, it's good for you!
It's funny how we all think we have a 'full plate' on a daily basis then we find out that our plate could be full of other things that are even heavier and it looks like that's your plate right now.
I really appreciate the way you write and, in all honesty, it really seems like you have more of a handle on things than you think you do. Your words are strong, concise and methodical - they show that your thinking is just the same. And something else, you may feel that you've 'vented' here, and you have (we all have - more than once!) but you've also been a strong, helping entity here many times. This is just a moment in time when we get to return the favor so thanks for letting us in to your life today - it's good for us!

Re: THANK YOU ! ---- yes, i have been preoccupied w/ my own problems right now and also i am very shy .

john h on 4/11/02 at 09:56 (079212)

Linda: I wish had some great words to make you feel better. I will suggest that you take life one day at a time or to live in the moment. If you can try not to get bogged down in next week, next month, or next year. Are there any support groups in your area? I would suspect that your hospital social services department may have a list of support groups. Have you seen the move 'A Beautiful Mind'? People do have a way of getting better and surviving no matter how bad things seem at the moment. Keep on expressing your feelings with all on the board as there are a large group of people pulling and praying for your recovery to a better life.