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Hello to my dear friends,

Posted by Tammie on 10/30/02 at 13:06 (098679)

It seems as though I don't pop in as much as I used to. But I do lurk on ocasion. I have been working on (me) for some time and actually am feeling better about my self. I have been learning to take care of (me) which has been such a hurdle for me. But I have been progressing.

I now use that horrible thing looking like a cane and sitting there taunting me and my mind about what a loser I would be if I picked it up and it helped me! LOL but now I laugh right back at it and pick it up andvlovingly use it to help myself. I really have to laugh as I really hated to look at it often hiding it like a child , but now we have made peace with it and I use it anytime it might help give me a bit of relief. Oh yes I am going to decorate it for the holidays , I was thinking of adding a bell or something to . LOL.

Life for me has been hectic looking for a great many cures, knowing that there are no such things , but if it relieves a little then that is great! I have this thing about RSD My hubby thinks I am a bit nutso, because I talk to it(RSD) , I tell it on the days I go to work and it makes it horrible for me to go out, I say go ahead make it harder cause you have stollen enough of my life and I am not giving you the rest!! It gives me more determination and I do eventualy win, maybe pay later maybe not as those with RSD know You are miserable weather you sit or lay or if you get up and move or work with it. I have a pretty good pain doc, he has helped my pain level down a bit and the great thing is I now sleep .

I am not saying I am all better as there are good with the bad, but the medication has been very helpful! I am going to atempt something that I would never had done with thease feet of mine, but Fri,my hubby and I are going to take a longer weekend and drive to see our son in Ky. His car is bonkers and his dad is going to tow him one and pick his up.So we thought it maybe would be a good time for us to just relax and do something like this and stay in a hotel or something . I am very nervous about this as I worry about the pain cycles can come any time and can be pretty miserable and I hate the idea of being away or driving if it starts in one of the bad times. But again I am telling my body , NO I am not giving up I am going and I am going to enjoy myself.(I will take my meds) I am thinking of taking my heating pad as that is a close friend

I also have recieved the best gift of all thru this horrible testing and dx and blocks and such. I want to share it with you. I was a person who never cryed or whined about pain< I was super mom super wife and super aske me anything I would do it person.Never complained about who used me or who hurt me or whatever. I never took care of (me). Well I have learned this and am doing much better and the best of all is My hubby and I have grown much closer do to this. He really has changed and definetly for the best. Where as once we didnt really talk about things or I never let my true feelings out do to being embarresed that I might be a faliure because I can not cope with pain or something that I could not control. Any ways to make this short lol I now respect my self and I now acept that I am not super anything I am a woman and I have feelings and I have pain just like anyone and the big thing (is its OK) We also now are much more verbal about our feelings which initself did wonders for our marriage.

Now this was the gift that I recieved . I am not angry any longer as even tho it is not what I want it has been a blind blessing that turned me around and brought me a much lighter life and allowing me to say NO and not feel as tho I am a horrible person because I let someone down. So this is my life to date and I still need to lurk with my friends in mind and I am trying to continue on with taking care of me, and not beg otheres to fix me. I have to do that work, and it gets tiresome often then I peak in and read some of what I posted thru the year and I think I have come a long way! So To all of my friends I again thank u for being there for me and I really appreciate the love and care I was shown. Soon I shall return to maybe help others but right now I have alot of work to do with me!

Re: Hello to my dear friends,

Julie on 10/30/02 at 16:35 (098695)

And that's exactly what you ought to be doing, Tammie. It's good to hear from you, and very good to hear you talking so clearly and positively. What a lot of progress you've made: thanks for sharing it with us.

Re: Julie, You are wonderful and part is do to your guidence

Tammie on 10/30/02 at 18:29 (098701)

Thank u!I have much more to do. Laurie has been helping along with Janet on the RSD stuff but it is also all of you that have been there for me. Those who kept me in there thoughts and prayers as I will do for them and all that are in this place of foot horrors! Thanks to all.

Re: Hello to my dear friends,

Suzanne D on 10/30/02 at 19:33 (098710)

Tammie, I am so proud of you! You stand as a fine example of how to come to grips with pain and change and be the better for it. I do think of you often and pray for you and am happy to read this update.

Enjoy your trip to Kentucky to see your son! The leaves are at their peak in my part of Kentucky right now, so I hope you have some beautiful scenery to look at as you travel.

Take care, and keep up the good work!
Suzanne :-)

Re: Hello to my dear friends,

Necee on 10/30/02 at 21:15 (098737)

Hi Tammie,
How nice to read that you're taking control of your life. We may never conquer our physical pains, but we sure can control our thoughts and how we manage mentally. I'm a firm believer in positive thinking, anyone who continually thinks negative thoughts is going to be a very miserable person.

I'm so happy for you Tammie, with your new outlook I just know that you'll get better. I will continue to pray for you.

Take care and stay in touch

Happy trails.....

Necee

Re: Hello to my dear friends,

BrianG on 11/01/02 at 18:14 (098962)

Hi Tammie,

I still think of you often, and hope the job is not wearing you down too much. I'm glad that you are taking the time to work on 'you'. Don't forget to keep your doctor fully up to date with what is happening to you. It will help if you ever have to file for SSD. My doctor was the main reason that I was approved!

Aloha
Brian

Re: Hello to my dear friends,

Julie on 10/30/02 at 16:35 (098695)

And that's exactly what you ought to be doing, Tammie. It's good to hear from you, and very good to hear you talking so clearly and positively. What a lot of progress you've made: thanks for sharing it with us.

Re: Julie, You are wonderful and part is do to your guidence

Tammie on 10/30/02 at 18:29 (098701)

Thank u!I have much more to do. Laurie has been helping along with Janet on the RSD stuff but it is also all of you that have been there for me. Those who kept me in there thoughts and prayers as I will do for them and all that are in this place of foot horrors! Thanks to all.

Re: Hello to my dear friends,

Suzanne D on 10/30/02 at 19:33 (098710)

Tammie, I am so proud of you! You stand as a fine example of how to come to grips with pain and change and be the better for it. I do think of you often and pray for you and am happy to read this update.

Enjoy your trip to Kentucky to see your son! The leaves are at their peak in my part of Kentucky right now, so I hope you have some beautiful scenery to look at as you travel.

Take care, and keep up the good work!
Suzanne :-)

Re: Hello to my dear friends,

Necee on 10/30/02 at 21:15 (098737)

Hi Tammie,
How nice to read that you're taking control of your life. We may never conquer our physical pains, but we sure can control our thoughts and how we manage mentally. I'm a firm believer in positive thinking, anyone who continually thinks negative thoughts is going to be a very miserable person.

I'm so happy for you Tammie, with your new outlook I just know that you'll get better. I will continue to pray for you.

Take care and stay in touch

Happy trails.....

Necee

Re: Hello to my dear friends,

BrianG on 11/01/02 at 18:14 (098962)

Hi Tammie,

I still think of you often, and hope the job is not wearing you down too much. I'm glad that you are taking the time to work on 'you'. Don't forget to keep your doctor fully up to date with what is happening to you. It will help if you ever have to file for SSD. My doctor was the main reason that I was approved!

Aloha
Brian