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Hey there, i am home from CA

Posted by Pam S. on 5/30/03 at 23:01 (120478)

Hi friends:
I got home this week from tending to my daughter who has mono. She was really sick so I am glad i went. She had to be on IVs. It got very hot in Santa Clara and her dorm room was terrible so she went to the hotel room with me.
It really was great to mother her ... wonderful bonding time for us. She will be able to finish her papers here over the summer just as you all said. Can she get thru finals next week. That is the question.She is not a happpy camper and wants to come home NOW but cannot blow the quarter off.If she takes the finals later she will forget everything. Bad timing. At least I do not have a graduation this week. WHEW!!!

Yuck. I hate it when my kids are sick. I am exhausted too.I have also started a myofacial realease therapy. The therapist says the whole body should be treated for foot problems..not just the feet. No energy to go into it now but what do any of you think of this.

How easy is it for an adult to get mono? I think I am just tired right now. I was super careful. I understand adults do not get it as easily.

Kathy, I hope you back is ok. wondering how you all are.Take care, Pam

Re: Hey there, i am home from CA

Kathy G on 5/31/03 at 09:36 (120504)

Hi Pam,

I've been wondering how you were doing. I'm pleased your daughter is beginning to feel better and that she can finish her papers over the summer. Tell her not to wait until the last minute like my darling daughter did! My daughter, who didn't have mono, but was quite sick at the end of the semester last year, had to take only one final as her other courses had papers that were considered final exams. It worked out well for her.

Is she very sleepy? How about her spleen - does it hurt? I can just imagine how much she wants to come home. By the end of the year, they've had it. Once my kids moved out of the dorms, they were happy to stay in their apartments in the summer but not while they were in the dorms. My daugher had chronic strep throats while living in the dorm. She had never had one before, or since, but for those two years, she had a strep throat every other month, it seemed. Two doctors theorized that someone (maybe her roommate) was a 'carrier' who didn't have the symptoms but passed it on to others. I was so grateful when she got out of there! Dormitories are not conducive to health! Of course, neither is college life but we've all been there and done that!

I have known adults who have gotten mono but it's rare. Give yourself some time to rest. While it's rewarding, being a mother is exhausting! Especially when your child is sick. And it doesn't matter how old they are because they're always 'your child.'

Thanks for asking about my back. I went for the xrays and the blood tests and will have to wait until June 23 to get the results and see the doctor. I don't believe I have spondylitis. I think he is just covering all bases. My osteoarthritis, which is new, is really acting up. Today and yesterday weren't so bad but I think all the rain we've been having was making it worse. In the month of May, we had just three sunny days! I'm hoping that when I get the shot of cortisone in my hand, I'll feel much better.

I hope you feel better soon. I don't know anything about myofacial release therapy but I'm sure others on this board do.

Take care and welcome home!

Re: Hey there, i am home from CA

JudyS on 5/31/03 at 16:37 (120548)

I'm glad to hear from you Pam - I was wondering about your daughter. I just wish I was a lot closer. My son has finals coming up also so he's working hard to be ready for them - he's at Cal Poly in San Luis Obispo which is about 2.5 hours south of your daughter.
Hope she's OK :)

Re: Hey there, i am home from CA

Suzanne D on 5/31/03 at 16:51 (120551)

I've been thinking about your daughter and wondering how she was doing, Pam. I'm so glad you were able to go out to her. I hope she can make it through finals week without too much stress and with enough energy to do what she has to do. It's good she was able to go to the hotel with you. I agree: dorms are NOT conducive to good health!

You take care, and get some extra rest now that you're home!
Suzanne :)

Re: Hey there, i am home from CA

marie on 5/31/03 at 21:19 (120575)


I am soooooo glad that you made a trip out to see your daughter. I hope in a few months your daughter will be feeling better and this experience will be just a faint memory. The main thing is that she not get to stressed out and get finished with this year and go home.

My son is a freshmen. He is attending a local university but lives on campus. He was sick all winter with one sinus infection after another. Then right before Christmas he told me he had a lump on the inside of his bottom lip that was getting bigger. Well because it was the holidays we couldn't get him in to the dentist until the first of Jan. The oral surgeon that removed the tumor said it was the largest one he had ever seen. Fortunately it was benign. He was so glad that he decided on the college down the street because he came home after his surgery and just collapsed. He stayed home for about 3 weeks...only going to his classes and doing homework. I don't know how he did it but he aced all his classes. He was nominated and won the Freshman Chemistry and Physics award and also the Freshman Chemical Engineering Award. He was so sick all year but he kept going. He was also very stressed about his classes....somehow it all worked out. I am confident that your daughter will do well. It is refreshing to know that she is very serious about her education. I hope that she is home soon so she can recover. You are a good Mom.


Re: So nice to get your messages

Pam S. on 5/31/03 at 21:19 (120576)

Hello ladies!
I am so touched by your replies. You are all so thoughtful.

I am feeling more like myself today. I am a person who needs alot of sleep. Also, I do not cope well with much stress. I am such a whimp!!!
My daughter will be fine but boy, what a wicked virus that mono is. I could not believe how much pain she had with that. I am so glad I went because she really seemed to appreciate it and I really FELT needed. I made lots of trips to Safeway and to the local diner to get mashed potatoes. We did spend some time in the dorm room when we got sick of the hotel. The weather was beautiful. I love CA. A nice change from the freezing cold, wet spring we have had here.

It was fun being in the dorm room and gossiping with the girls. I would not want to live in a dorm room but it does all look like fun. Friends coming in and out all of the time. The campus at Santa Clara looks like a resort. I should have been able to go to a college like that!!! I have not seen Cal Poly. I know it is a great school. I was impressed with SCU but my daughter seems a little unsettled. Most of the kids are from CA and go home on the weekends etc. They are really on the move there so it does not have the cohesiveness that some colleges have I suppose.(that is what she says) Oh, the grass it always greener. Her best friend who goes to Notre Dame(and loves it) was there while I was there, as were several other of her friends. That made it more hard for her to be in bed while they went to Santa Cruz and gazzed around. They just all slept on the dorm room floors.I do feel old.

It is interesting how weather affects us. I am sure I notice I feel more pain when it is damp or there is a storm coming. Living in CA would be a more consistant temperature. I love the Northern area of CA. We went to Nordstroms the last night in Palo Alto to buy just one little something. (I always say a little shopping is a boost to the immune system.! While we were looking at shoes, My daughter advised me she thought I was OBSESSED with my feet. I should stick to these board totally right, ladies.

I hope you all have had a nice weekend. My 14 year old daughter has finals next week too. I have to try to keep her off of the aol chatting. Any suggestions? She is so social. Feel well and I will be interested to hear how everyone is doing. Warmly, Pam

Re: I think we are all good moms

Pam S. on 5/31/03 at 23:54 (120586)

HA Marie, we were typing at the very same time. HA

I am glad your son got thru THAT freshman year. That sounded like quite the challenge and to end with honors like that. You must be so proud.

Being a parent is such a challenge these days. It certainly is worth it, but times have changed so much since we were young. My high school freshman is exposed to so much earlier than my college freshman. I see quite a difference. We all just try to do the best we can... right?

My daughter in college has also gained a pile of weight and cannot fit into any of her clothes. I know all about the 'freshman 15' but this is more like 30. I do not think she drinks that much but who knows. The food in college is terrible, i know. I have sent her articles on healthy eating etc. It is a touchy subject and I do not want to say the wrong thing. I hope she will be able to lose it but should I buy her clothes when she comes home at this weight? Have any of you had this issue? I just want her to be healthy and I do not feel her diet is good at all. I am sort of a health nut with diet. Now that she is not feeling well, I do not think this is the time to worry about it. I just cannot wait to feed her decent food.

I think our kids are dying to leave home, but once they are far away as my daughter is it is a bit more challenging that they expected. She wanted to go to school there so badly. I just think she misses the midwest more than she expected.

Enjoy your Sundays. Thank you, Pam

Re: I think we are all good moms

marie on 6/01/03 at 08:06 (120589)

My son is skinny as a rail and eats like a race horse. We were hoping he'd gain 15 lbs. Your daughter isn't alone when it comes to the freshman 15. I have had many, many female students come home from college with a little more weight than when they left. Cafeteria style dining three times a day is the best situation. It takes a while for kids to realize that they have to make healthier choices. Plus there is alot of stress their freshman year....so they tend to eat more comfort food. And of course if you add beer into the picture there is going to be a problem. Whether we like it or not beer is readily available in all of the dorms and it's just niav to think it's not. I am not saying that your daughter is drinking beer or is an alcoholic or anything....it's just that when you combine cafeteria food, stress and beer young folks are likely to put on a little weight. The price of freedom.

As far as shopping for new clothes goes it's not a bad idea as long as you don't make a fuss about her weight gain and size change. Sounds like she'll be in good hands. Once she starts to feel a little better maybe she can start walking.


Re: Pam

Kathy G on 6/02/03 at 09:23 (120699)

Hi Pam,

My daughter, who's a senior but has one more semester before she graduates, was home when I read your post about your daughter's weight gain. I asked her if she had any advice. My daughter has gained about fifteen pounds over four years and is currently trying to lose about five. She really doesn't need to worry about the other ten because she was slim.

Her great words of wisdom made a lot of sense to me since I have never encountered dormitory life. She says that when you live in the dorms, and you're eating in the dining hall, it's like going to a wonderful buffet every night. At first, you think you should try all the food that's available. After that, you stick to things you think the college cooks can't destroy; like pasta or pizza and other food you should be avoiding. She said you have to keep trying sensible things and hopefully, you'll find a dish, say a fish entree, that they do a pretty good job on. Then you try to eat that frequently.

She says that it's amazing how many people can't write a paper without eating at the same time. She had one roommate who, she said, consumed enormous amounts of potato chips, tortilla chips, etc. every time she did a term paper! She says you have to have good, healthy snacks in your dorm room, not junk. And you need to drink a lot of water. Every time you think you want a snack, grab a glass of water.

And walk to class and if you're like her, you'll end up practically running because you're always late!

It was really interesting to hear her talk about it. She seems to think that weight gain in inevitable, among most students, and she is so greatful not to be anorexic that she's not going to worry about a little extra weight. She says the number of college girls with eating disorders is incredible. My son's fiancee told me the same thing.

So, maybe you can subtley pass on some of her tips to your daughter. I guess you should be most happy that she isn't obsessed with her weight!

For what it's worth, that's her take on the weight issue!

Re: Hey there, i am home from CA

Mahatmelissama on 6/02/03 at 11:18 (120714)

Hi Pam,

I live in Willow Glen (District of San Jose), only 4 miles from there. Glad you enjoyed our weather. :)

Hope your daughter heals up soon. My roomate went to the Santa Clara U. That is a great school from what I hear.

Re: So nice to get your messages

JudyS on 6/02/03 at 17:34 (120749)

Oh gosh Pam - if I just had a nickel for all the times my children told me I was obsesssed with my feet and shoes! :)

I'll bet your visit to Santa Clara did wonders for your daughter. Just another example to our children of how really wonderful home is. Next time perhaps you'll be the one visiting Santa Cruz - it is truly lovely there, and around Monterey Bay in Monterey.
Northern and Southern CA have some differences - weather not being the least of them. You NEED to visit here in San Diego - you'd love it.